Past Lives || Dottore

46

There were a number of things wrong with her. She knew that.

She sat outside the cavern, ignoring the harsh blizzard around her. She stared into the snow flying around her, her mind playing tricks on her, making her believe that there were figures -creatures even, with broken limbs, double or even triple the number of heads- standing, walking, or crawling towards her. 

She knew they weren't real, yet it didn't stop her heart from pounding in fear that were. A frown appeared on her face. This side her was weak, pathetic, yet she couldn't exactly kill off that part of her body.

Not without killing her in the process.

She was a parasite -as she liked to think, though she knew that wasn't the proper term- in this woman's body, unfortunately living inside of her, being forced to watch the world through her eyes, see her memories every single time her eyes closed.

She had concluded that the host of this body didn't know that she existed, and she planned on keeping it this way. It was safer for the host -having a mind break on her wouldn't be the best course of action. It wouldn't be very pleasant for the both of them.

It was night at this time, sometime past 1 in the morning. She had awoken in the arms of the doctor she had made a bargain with many months ago -regrettably, but she didn't really have a choice at that time. She didn't have enough energy to have control over the body like that. Forcing a takeover took a lot of energy, and she hated the fact that she hadn't seen the outside world with her own eyes since the war.

She closed her eyes and smiled, reveling in the peaceful and bitter cold that she grew to adore. Ah, the war. It was a time that she loved, as she found conscious in the bloodshed in the probably innocent bodies in the battlefield. Not that she cared though, just as long as they died by her hand.

To feel the life drain from a body once again would feel magnificent.

Especially right now. She felt extremely tempted to choke the life out of the doctor who was deeper in the cave, still asleep. She knew she couldn't though. The host of this body had feelings for the damned thing, and she would hate for the host to wake up to her hands wrapped around the bastard's throat.

She fought the urge to gag. The feelings the host felt was feelings of love and the feelings were so strong that even she felt them. She shivered involuntary -not from the cold, but from disgust.

Whatever. A topic for another time. 

She stood up, wiping some snow that stuck to her backside. It was time to go back to sleep and allow the host to retake control. She did want to stay out in the cold for a little while longer, but she began to feel the host stir in the back of her mind -a bad sign for her.

She took one looking look out into the blizzard. There was a number of stray thoughts.

What if I just ran?

If I just fled the mountain?

Be free from the fucking doctor?

Go into a life of hiding, away from the prying eyes of civilization?

The thoughts went away as soon they appeared. She knew they were only her thoughts; the host was too in love with the damned doctor to act on any of these mildly intrusive thoughts.

Pity. If she was her own person, she'd allow these thoughts to take control of her body. She'd flee from the doctor without a second thought.

She sighed, turning her attention away from the blizzard and back to the warm insides of the cavern. She stopped in front of the dragon heart, her eyes narrowing at the uncomfortable warmth coming from the thing.

She got a little sidetracked, she'll have to admit, but she also wanted to take a look at the heart while she had a chance. Her hand reached out to touch it, stopping just before her fingertips brushed against the painfully hot heart. She pulled her hand away. Never mind, she didn't have a death wish.

"Y/n? What are you doing up?" His husky voice was nearly covered up by the roaring sound of the blizzard outside, but the host in the back of her mind stirred at the sound of his voice.

How annoying.

How did the host act again?

She turned around, putting a faint smile on her face, hoping the smile reached her eyes. "Sorry, did I wake you up?"

The doctors' ruby eyes -those damned fucking eyes- narrowed at her. "You're not Y/n."

Her smile dropped immediately. "Damn. I need to work on my impression of her." She rolled her eyes. "Whatever. I would say it is a pleasure to talk to you face-to-face once more, but truly, it's not."

He sat up, rolling his head around to work out the knots that had formed on his neck muscles. "Likewise." He stopped, looking at her. "Why have you appeared again? Here for another bargain?"

She scoffed. "Please. One bargain is good enough. I have no wish to sell my soul to the devil."

A smile bloomed on his face. She felt the host stir once more, waking up because of the man in front of her. "You think I'm the devil? How flattering."

She glared at him, fighting the urge to slap him across the face. He was ruining her only free time. She just decided to say the shortened version of the truth. "The blizzard was too tempting. I just couldn't stay quiet inside of here the whole time." She bowed, putting a little of exaggeration behind it.

"Is that so?" He didn't believe her.

She didn't expect him too.

"Yes. Now, I am feeling a little bit tired -exhausted, really- so I'll let your dear beloved back into your life." She gave him a sarcastic smile. "I do hope you'll catch me when I fall, hmm? I don't want this fragile body to suffer from any bumps or scratches."

With that, she closed her eyes, her body immediately falling the cavern floor. The doctor was quick to catch her, making sure she didn't hit herself on the way down. He frowned, not liking this other side of the one he loved so dearly.