Fall Apart

Chapter 33

Evelyn went to school the next morning but Lucas and I took the rest of the month off. We met at the café that afternoon and I just ran into his arms crying. I didn't care who was watching. For the next couple of days I felt completely lost, like I wasn't myself anymore. The only emotion I had left was grief. Lucas and I spent every one of those days in his dorm together, and I was so grateful for him. 

"I just don't know what to do anymore, Lucas. Now with my mom gone, I feel like there's no one left who really... knows me. The girl I was before this mess happened," I say one day, trying my best not to cry.

"I know that I haven't known you for that long, but Maya... I know exactly who you are. You're Maya Ann Hart. You're strong and kind. You're the most beautiful girl I have ever met, and you'll do anything for the people you love. Because that's who you are. And I am so sure of it, because that day at the coffee shop I picked Maya Hart. Because I fell in love with the girl who tells jokes and isn't afraid to use her voice and that's not you being anyone else, that's you," he said, before kissing me. 

It made me feel a lot better. Then the next couple of days Lucas stayed with me while Sarah and I planned mom's funeral. First we had Goodwin sent to Sarah until I could get my own place, then Sarah selected a funeral director and was in charge of that. I was in charge of ordering the casket and floral décor. I ordered some white Hyacinth's, some white Snapdragon's, some Queen Anne's Lace, some white Granny's Bonnet, some white Scilla and some pale yellow Orchids because they are mom's favorite flowers. Then we planned that the final viewing will be held at our childhood home, and Lucas could come to that if he would like. The official funeral would be held at The Abyssinian Baptist Church, and then Sarah, Lucas and I would go back to our childhood home and clean it up a bit so that it can be sold, which was a hard decision for Sarah and I but it's too big for just one of us to live in so it was the only option. 

We finished the planning when Evelyn came in.

"Hey, are you bringing someone to this?" she asked.

"Well, yeah, I'm taking Lucas, he met my mum, briefly over the phone, but you never got the chance to," I said. 

She nods but I can tell she is slightly disappointed. Later that night I was in my room when Evelyn gently knocked on the door, it was her room too so she didn't have to do that but I do really appreciate it. I called to say that she could come in and she came and sat down next to me. I could tell she wanted to tell me something but she was cautious because she didn't want to look like all she cares about is herself.

"Just tell me Evie, it's okay," I say, hugging her.

She nodded, and smiled a little.

"When you leave, I'm going to be so lonely," she says.

"Is that it?" I ask and she nods, "Evie, just branch out, make some new friends. There's no reason you can only be friends with our group."

"Yeah, I guess you're right," she says, "thanks Maya"

That's the end of Chapter 33! Chapter 34 will be out tomorrow! Bye lovelies! xxx