𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩 𝟒𝟑

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Soon? When's soon?

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Soon? When's soon?

I've been up all night, crying, trying to figure out how to get him back. I have no idea what's going on on his end by having no contact with him. But I still feel like I need to do something to help.

I've called Ryder's father, but he won't help me. "I've already done it once before, he's on his own." pathetic excuse for a father.

I lie on our bed, tears flooding the pillow beneath me, my breathing unstable, yet another panic attack taking over me. But I just let it happen, the only thing that can help is Ryder, and he's not here. It's pointless to even try.

This one is strong though, enough to make me feel the need to throw up. Suddenly, I shoot up, holding onto my stomach before instinctively running to the toilet.

I hang over the bowl, a mix of vomit and tears flooding out of me. Toxic acid sits in the back of my throat as I finally slump back against the wall, sobbing into my knees, crying to the point of not being able to catch a breath.

I need my Ryder back. I'm falling apart without him.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

It's now been an entire night and day, and Ryder is still in custody for 'further investigation.'

I've spent the whole day with Wren and Finn, as they thought they'd do some help by giving me company. Which it has, it's better off than being alone.

Finn doesn't seem that phased by this, meanwhile, I'm having a total meltdown. But I'm sure he's just trying to keep himself together for my sake.

Wren, on the other hand, has been holding onto me as I cry into her arms, soothing and reassuring me this whole time.

Finns decided to go out to grab lunch for us, and while I don't have much of an appetite, I'm sure he's starving. I haven't been keeping track of the time, as it's only reminding me of the minutes passing that I don't have Ryder, but it's probably around late afternoon already.

"I'm falling apart Wren, I fall apart without him," I explain through tears. I don't think they've stopped running down my face since they've started, I don't know how to stop them.

She strokes my hair, my head laying in her lap as I curl up on the couch. "I'm sick, I keep vomiting, I have constant headaches, I'm so exhausted." I genuinely feel like I'm shutting down without him, I didn't think it would be this serious. My body simply can't function without him.

Wren doesn't reply, she stops stroking my hair, and I feel her body change beneath me, enough for me to sit up and look at her through watery eyes.

Despite the current situation, she's got a wide smile stretched across her face, "Vivienne.." she chuckles, slight happiness in her voice. I stare back at her in confusion, silence stretching between us.

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