𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩 𝟒𝟔

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I wasn't kidding when I told Vivienne I was going to marry her again, and ten times over

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I wasn't kidding when I told Vivienne I was going to marry her again, and ten times over. I want it done properly this time. A real proposal, a real wedding, I want to see that pretty smile of hers on our wedding day, not her eyes full of tears and regret. It's what she deserves.

And while I highly doubt she'll say no, I'm still scared shitless. I haven't been able to eat a bite of food all night. I had rehearsed the words in my head a hundred times, but now that the moment was approaching, I feel like I might vomit all the words out.

And Finn's sneaky, 'reassuring' winks from across the table don't help at all.

For weeks, I had been carefully arranging the perfect moment to propose to her. Finn had been in on the secret the whole time, hence why he is here now.

The pregnancy was just the icing on the cake for me, making me feel like the most luckiest man alive. But I'm also shit scared of that too, I don't know what I'm doing, but I'll figure it out.

I didn't know what I was doing with Viv either, I didn't know anything about relationships or marriages, but here I am, the happiest I've ever been. I'll figure out being a father too.

It'll all be worth it, for my two favourite people.

The ring sits in my suit pocket, my hand resting on her thigh as she talks to Wren from across the table. Wren doesn't know, nobody but Finn knows. I trusted him to keep it a secret, and he's good when it comes to these things. He's just stoked that I told him.

I feel my heart sit in the back of my throat as I pull my hand away from Vivienne, somewhat grabbing her attention, disappointed that I moved away.

But It's time, and I'm more than ready, despite the nerves that are churning in my stomach.

I rose from the table, brushing past Vivienne and standing beside her chair, extending my hand towards her. She lifted her attention towards me, her eyebrows furrowed. Despite her confusion, she listened anyways, reaching out for my hand, and standing from her chair without questions.

I take a deep breath as she hesitantly scans the restaurant. I had reserved a more private area of the restaurant for this, I knew she wouldn't like to be put on show for everyone."Why are we standing?" her eyes meet mine again, a confused smile playing on her face.

I ignored her question, holding her hands in mine, the nerves overpowering me. As I looked into her eyes, I couldn't help but feel a sudden sense of vulnerability wash over me, the only person I've ever felt vulnerable with. Suddenly, words start falling out of my mouth.

"I didn't know what love was before you," I whispered softly, my voice barely above a whisper. It was as if the words were escaping my lips before I even had a chance to fully process them, but I let them go anyways, I mean everything I say.

I was always so afraid of love, I didn't believe in it, but now I know it wasn't that I didn't believe in love, but I was saving it all for her.

"And even if it was forced in the beginning," I continued, my voice growing stronger, "I know damn well it isn't now." Even though there are others in the room, it suddenly feels like it was just the two of us, with very little space left between us.

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