The arrangement | Charles Leclerc

Chapter thirty

The next morning I woke up to Lewis getting ready. I laughed seeing him running around the room getting stuff.

' leaving so soon? ' I said as I sat up.

' yeah, I have to go to the track it's already 10 ' he said as he went and got his sunglasses.

' can I come with you?? ' I asked him.

' of course come on let me help you ' he said as he came and helped me get out of bed as i was still feeling a little sore.

As we got out of the room Lewis and I made our way to the elevator, we met Daniel who was also heading to the track. We made some small talk in the elevator and then Daniel headed to track with us because we were already heading there anyway so why not go with him.

— — — —

Later when we got to the track Lewis parked the car, then we started heading for the paddock. As we walked I felt weird being back here especially with that I had to see Charles later on. But it was media day so maybe I didn't have to see him at all but I couldn't be sure. In any way I would be with Chloe & Lewis all day anyway so it wouldn't matter that much. Well that was what I tried telling myself anyway.

As we walked into the paddock I saw Charles standing there talking to Carlos with Charlotte standing besides him with his arm around her shoulder. I had always tried telling myself that it didn't bother me seeing them together because I didn't wanna be the jealous and toxic wife. But I couldn't lie anymore it hurt seeing them together knowing that he'd never love me like he loved Charlotte. But at the same time I was happy that they had found each other and I could see they were deeply in love, I had been the one who stood in the way from them getting their happy ending and I didn't see it until now. It hurt me knowing that I had to leave him over to her cause that was the only fair thing to do, two people who love each other that much needs to get to be together and if I was the one who stood in the way of that any longer than I already had I would just feel worse about it.

I would in general just feel worse about being the third wheel in my own marriage.

I wanted to be happy for them I really wanted to but in some way it only hurt trying to be happy for them. But knowing they loved each other so much made me feel a little bit better, it any way made the pain feel lighter.

I remembered when I saw them me and Charles were gonna sign the divorce papers this Saturday. Gosh I'd totally forgot about that in this whole chaos circus, or maybe I just had tried to repress it cause I didn't want it to hurt as much as it did. Why did I have to fall for him, just why did I have to. I wished that I didn't because then this divorce wouldn't be painful at all and I would have no problem to let go.

Maybe that was one of the problems with me I got attachment issues, I got attached to a person and then when they leave, I beg them to stay but every time unsuccessfully, I get depressed, meet someone new and the cycle repeats.

So maybe I should've seen this coming in one way but on the other hand I didn't want to see it coming. I didn't want to go through this again, I wanted Charles to stay but I knew I couldn't make him do that. It would've been mean to him and I didn't wanna be mean to him and Charlotte as they were so happy together.

— — — —

Saturday qualifying day & divorce day.

I stood there looking at the track as qualifying was starting in like one and a half hour. Feeling completely empty, today was the day, the day I had to let him go. Even though I didn't want to but to make him happy and in order not to stand in the way of him and Charlotte I would do it.

As I stood there looking at the track I heard someone's voice behind me. It was Samantha who had just arrived yesterday.

' can I stand here with you?? ' she said.

' yeah, of course ' I answered.

' tough day? '

' yeah kind of, have a lot on my mind '

' I know what your going through, it's though ' she said as I looked at her in shock.

' what do you mean?? '

' I also got divorced from my first husband, well he wanted the divorce but I didn't want to divorce, I begged him to stay and let me tell you at first your not gonna want to let go but with time it's gonna get better ' Samantha said as she just looked at the track.

For a moment we just stood there.

' did it hurt? ' I asked reluctantly.

' letting go? '

I nodded slightly.

' not as much as holding onto something that wasn't real '

— — — —

' listen holding onto something that has no future hurts more than letting them go, your gonna find someone else who treats you like you deserve if you give it time ' Samantha said as she walked away to wish her brother good luck.

I stood there stuck with her words in my mind. ' not as much as holding onto something that wasn't real ' I knew she was right. It would hurt more holding onto something that didn't have any future and that wasn't real.

Eventually qualifying started so I went to quickly wish Lewis good luck before he jumped into the car. Then I watched the qualifying session in the Mercedes garage, I could be out there right now it was too much people.

After qualifying Lewis got p1, valterri p2, Daniel p3, max p4 and Charles p6.

The first thing after qualifying I waited for Lewis to get back and get out of the car, then I ran and hugged Lewis when he got out of the car.

' You did amazing! ' I said as I hugged him and he hugged me back.

' thank you ' Lewis said before he had to go and meet the rest of the team.

— — — —

When Lewis was done talking with the team I headed with him to his drivers room before I had to leave for the lawyers office to sign those damn divorce papers.

As I sat on his couch in his drivers room, I looked at my phone quickly then talked some with Lewis about tomorrow. We had already agreed on going out for dinner after I had signed the divorce papers with Chloe, Avery, Carlos, Samantha , heidi and Daniel. We had also agreed to meet them all at the restaurant because I was gonna sign the divorce papers then Lewis came and picked me up so we could drive there together.

After Lewis had changed and talked some with toto and bono we were all set to go back to the hotel and change then head to the lawyers office.