Olethros

fifteen - freyja

By the time I could slip through the wave of people to winnow, too much time had passed. My heart was pounding and I refused to look at the sky. I'd spent an hour wandering the apothecary until I gathered the nerve to walk out of the door. I slipped around the corner and into the alleyway. I surely spent too long listening for anyone to walk by before I finally winnowed back to the apartment.

I hardly had time to materialize before a hand was around my throat and my back hit a wall. A scream was caught at the pressure of the attacker's palm- skillfully, as though they'd done this before. My hands shot out to claw at whoever held me, but their voice had me going rigid.

"Where the fuck were you?"

"A- Az," I choked out. My hands lifted to his wrist, tugging at his hold. He loosened it, allowing me to suck in a breath, but he didn't release me.

"Where were you?" He repeated. I could feel the fury of his words like a branding iron on my cheek. His hot breath made it through the hood of my cloak. I circled my fingers around his wrist, letting my head fall back in relief.

"I wanted to walk the street; to see if anyone spoke of me."

"Do you think I haven't been doing that? What were you thinking? You're the most wanted person in the Night Court and you went out to walk the street?" His voice didn't leave its low tone, but his anger heightened it all the same.

"I don't know! I just wanted to feel free one last time before I'm locked away in the mountains," I cried. I shoved at his arm, but he stepped closer. His thigh pinned my hip to the wall, the hot breath even more searing.

"It was your choices that led you to this. You wouldn't be locked away if you didn't run away," Azriel seethed. Gods, I wanted to punch him.

"I thought you understood! I ran away for my freedom! A life alone is far better than a life dictated."

Azriel scoffed before shoving away from me. I faintly noticed the sudden chill that ran over me at his absence. I stayed against the wall, my fingers mindlessly rising to rub against where his had pressed into my skin.

"Do you not realize what your life is now? I just left a meeting with your father. He has Illyrian warriors scouring the mountains for you. Rhysand put it into his head that you could reach anywhere on your own because you've studied his maps. Because you chose to hide away from marriage, you're forcing yourself to hide away for the rest of your eternal fucking life, Freyja."

My throat bobbed as I lowered my hand. Azriel's back was to me. I could see behind his wings that his hand ran through his hair repeatedly. He was stressed over me, I'd done this to him.

"If you don't want to help me, you don't have to," I muttered. He whipped around, pinning me with a glare that should promise me a slow death.

"I'm already in this deep, Freyja. Even if I stopped now, I committed treason for no reason. If I'm going to die for helping you, I should at least follow through," Azriel spat. As much as it terrified me, I kept my eyes on his.

"You could stop this now and act shocked at any news about me. You could return to your 'search' and let me fend for myself-."

"And what do you know about that? Do you know how to get to the cabin? Do you know how to winnow to another court without the wards being triggered? There will be a hunt for you no matter where you go, Freyja. You may as well turn yourself back in. Do you think that you'll survive on the mountainside if you cannot find the cabin? Think, Freyja. You cannot do this on your own, and as stupid as I am for helping you, I will not quit until it is finished."