ɢᴇᴛᴀᴡᴀʏ ᴄᴀʀ ★ 𝘴𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘯𝘪𝘰𝘭𝘰 𝘪𝘮𝘢𝘨𝘪𝘯𝘦𝘴

↳ 𝔬𝔭𝔦𝔞

𝙒𝙊𝙍𝘿 𝘾𝙊𝙐𝙉𝙏 ; 1029

imagine no. thirty-three !

'✵•.¸,✵°✵.｡.✰ 𝔪𝔞𝔱𝔱 ✰.｡.✵°✵,¸.•✵'

𝘼/𝙉 ; this will contain a glossary at the end bc mark twain is hanging in my head rn and he needs to get out of here before I destroy his bloodline (I'm literally his bloodline) and he's making me feel very writer esk rn

𝙎𝙐𝙈𝙈𝘼𝙍𝙔 ; not everyone is going to hurt you.

𝐂𝐖! use of 'y/n', crying, mentions of someone walking out of a relationship, unresolved ending, not proofread

❝𝔬𝔭𝔦𝔞❞

walking out of your bedroom, you're met with a knock at the front door. startling your dazed state.

you rub at your eyes, harsher than you had intended. pulling your hands back to leave your vision blurry for several long seconds.

you don't want to answer the door, but you know if you're going to play this 'im fine' role, you can't ignore the gentle tapping.

more hurried knocks ring throughout your living room, finally sending you up to the wooden door. checking yourself in the mirror, you quickly pull your hair out of a claw clip and look through the peephole.

finding matt on the other side, hair wet from the light rain. his face shows worry, and slight panic.

letting out a hushed breath of air, you unlock the door and pull it open.

matts eyes immediately flash to yours, but you look at his car, avoiding his gaze. "are you uh- fuck." he mumbles, running his hands down his face. "I heard what happened with calvin."

you shrug, switching your eyes to the ground. staring at the metal piece under the doorframe that separates your home from the world. "im fine. i wanted to leave him anyways."

when his breath hitches, you finally meet his eyes. he looks at you with a look that isn't intended to be hurtful, but it does. 'do you think im a dumbass?' his face read. but you aren't surprised that it hurt you. everything's hurt you the last few days.

"can i come in?" he queries, "or do you want space?"

shaking your head, you bite down hard on your lip. meeting his eyes when you unintentionally bring a metallic taste to your tongue. "don't give me space, please." you say softly, "space is that last thing I need from you right now."

his eyes glow for the split second it takes him to forget the circumstances in which he stands here right now. he nods gently, taking a step into your home.

you can't describe the rubatosis that floods your brain. the utter feeling of your heart pounding echoes in your brain and in your blood. threatening to burst out and let you hit the floor. you feel nervous. ready to fall to your knees with nausea, nervous.

shutting the door slowly, you search for the euphoric sensation of the rain pattering against your window, and your best friend standing in your living room.

turning to look to matt, his eyes soften as he finally gets a good look at you. rain no longer clouding his vision.

"tell me how i can fix this," he intoned, taking a cautious step towards you.

you bite back a laugh, you felt pathetic. you didn't even call matt, but yet here he was. coming to rescue you from your mentally draining ex boyfriend.

"you can't." you mouthed. your voice hushing itself to a heartbreaking whisper, barely audible over the television playing at a low volume.

watching the heartbreak in his eyes, you couldn't stand it. you were trying so hard not to cry in front of him but the opia was so frustrating.

he felt such an aenonic love as he stared at you. watching you make your way to the couch. sitting down with your knees tucked tightly up to your chest.

it hurt him to know that the person he loved so deeply felt hurt in the air of her own home.

"you deserve more," his whispers. "you look so run down, y/n."

"im fine, matt." you mumble. your voice still low and tremulous.

"lying is gonna get you know where." matt shakes his head, stepping towards you and kneeling down on the floor. taking your hands ij his equally shaky ones. "you can look at me," he smiled reassuringly. bringing your knuckles up to his lips. "i promise you it's gonna be okay."

you met his eyes hesitantly. not sure how long you'll be able to maintain eye contact with him. "I can't do this, matt." you breathed. tears finally escaping and trickling quickly down your cheeks.

his eyes widen at your sudden sobs, pulling you close to him. "shh," he hushes lightly, rubbing circles into your neck with his thumb. "im sorry," he whispers. "im so, so sorry."

you couldn't bring yourself to speak. knowing your voice would break halfway through the first word anyways. you hugged matt as tight as possible. never wanting to let go.

"not everyone is going to hurt you," matt insinuated, pulling you deeper into his arms. carefully holding your head in his neck in an attempt to keep himself from crying too.

the boy stared tiredly up at the ceiling, biting his lip to keep himself from saying too much. keeping himself from telling you how much he hated calvin and how he knew he would hurt you, but he couldn't do that. he also couldn't mumble out the three words of affection. which hurt him. "im sorry," is all he could muster up, mumbling into your hair.

"please-" you husked, "please don't leave me too."

and that's all it took to break matt.

he tensed up in your arms, tears finally fighting their way out of his eyes. "I won't," he mouthed, you could barely hear him, but it was enough. "I promise I'll never leave you. you're my best friend, I'll love you forever."

he winced at his own words, only making himself cry harder.

he hated that stupid kid and his stupid face and the stupid way he made you fall in love and the stupid way he left you for a stupid girl. he hated the way calvin made you happy and not him.

"it's all going to be alright." matt hushed, pressing a soft kiss into the top of your head.

GLOSSARY

rubatosis - the feeling of ones own heartbeat

euphoric/euphoria - happiness

opia - the ambiguous intensity of looking someone in the eye

aeonic/aeonia - internally everlasting