Aadhya- The Phoenix Within (Previously known as Aadhya- And Her Journey Towards)

Chapter- 1 Aadhya

Aadhya's POV

"Please leave me," I yelled, trying to run for my life, but Dhruv and his gang laughed evilly, then one of his members slapped me hard, making me land on the ground and his hand reached to tear my clothes.

"Nooo," I gasped and jerked back from sleep.

Sweat dripping from my forehead, my hands and legs are trembling with fear. I can hear my thumping heart as I was struggling to breath.

It's only a dream. It's only a dream. Chanting this continuously, I concentrated on my breathing. It's a panic attack again... I need to control my breathing.

Inhale, exhale. Inhale, exhale. Inhale, exhale.

Finally, after half an hour of struggling, I calmed my racing heart and controlled my breathing as well.

These nightmares are never gonna leave me alone. I glanced at the watch and it showed 3am.

3 am again. Every night I woke up at 3 am with a nightmare, as if someone was ringing a bell to wake me up at the same time every night.

I want to sleep a whole night peacefully without any nightmares, panic attacks, sleep paralysis... I just wanna sleep. Is that too much to ask? Don't I deserve a good night's sleep?

I don't think I will ever sleep the entire night peacefully.

I took the bottle to have some water, but it was empty so I removed the duvet and stood up from the bed, then walked downstairs to have some water.

After drinking water, I went to Rose. She is sleeping peacefully, holding her stuffed toy. I covered her properly with the duvet and kissed her forehead before exciting her room.

It's my routine to check up on her whenever I wake up.

She is the reason I am still living. If not for her, I would have died a long time ago. Rose is my responsibility and I have to live for her, to protect her, to guide her, mainly, to love her.

I can endure anything for her.

I always wish it would've been better if I died instead of Anshu. The guilt I am carrying is not small. Every time I see Rose, I blame myself for taking her mom away from her.

I am dealing with the survivors' guilt along with this depression, anxiety, panic attacks and there are so many.

Will Rose also blame me when she find out that I am not her mother, but Anshu and her mom died to save me?

Will she hate me?

With so many wild thoughts running through my brain, I sat on the bed and opened my laptop.

I work whenever I can't sleep. The work will be completed, at least.

I worked till 6 am, then I did my morning business and took a shower.

I wore my usual black business suit and tied my hair in a bun. These dark circles made a permanent place below my eyes. Using a concealer, I tried to hide them as dad will feel bad if he knows I was not sleeping well.

I went to Rose's room to wake her up, but dad was already there.

"Good morning, dad," I greeted him

"Good morning, Aadhya," he greeted back with a pleasant smile, which I can never give him back.

"Rose is taking a shower. I will help her to get ready for school," Dad remarked.

"Ok, then I will go and prepare breakfast then," I commented and turned around to leave, but Brownie barked, stopping me.