Stars and snow

Bloody confession

POV: Atlas

My face was a deep scarlet while Grusha softly snored in my lap. It's 1 am and we were waiting for Grusha's mum to come home, with him falling asleep in the safety of my arms. Our chests were pressed together, his head resting on my shoulder and my hands on his hips, with his legs wrapped around my waist for comfort.

It was kind of weird seeing Grusha without his binder. He strictly told me to call him.. I mean her? To call her Cristine and prefer to her as a woman, and if I did accidentally call her Grusha we would say it's an inside joke of us giving each other a nickname of the opposite gender, me being nicknamed Alise.

I told her that she could always come out to her mom, so that Grusha wasn't pushed away into a closet forever, away from mum. 'But I won't have anywhere to stay then', Cristine answered.

'You can stay at my place, maybe the dorms and once your dad gets a new house, you can stay there!', I shot back.

'Still, my mum is important to me, she was the one to take care of me most of my life. I don't want to lose her, not yet..'

'If she really cares about you and your happiness, she would still love you even when you come out'

'I know', she had mumbled, cuddling up into my lap.

And that's how we ended up here.

I looked up when the front door slowly creaked open. A tall, blue haired woman walked into the house, slightly rubbing her eyes, not long after she spotted me and Cristine on the couch. 'Oh hello', she said with a small, not so sure and shy voice.

'Hi', I replied just as shyly.

She sat her bag down next to the couch, lifted Cristine out of my arms and carried her to probably her bedroom. After she finished, she returned to me in the living room, sitting down next to me. 'So.. are you Crissy's boyfriend?'

I immediately felt my cheeks burn. 'No I'm not!', I nervously exclaimed, making the woman next to me giggle.

'But you wish you could be?'

Again, bright red cheeks. 'Well.. umm.. I wouldn't really mind you know..', I mumbled, my voice going softer with the passing second.

'I'm Liose by the way', she said with a soft smile.

'Atlas', I replied, actually liking her for a second, before being reminded that she is homophobic.

We talked for a bit, mainly about work, school and the future, until a door at the end of the hall opened in a hurry and Cristine came running into the room. 'Oh thank Arceus you're not asleep yet'

'Hey Crissy', I said, still mentally giggling from her nickname, receiving a massive death stare.

'Hunny, why are you awake? You were just asleep', Liose asked, a worried look in her eyes.

'I want to talk to you..' she said, looking at me with scared eyes, 'about something important'

It hit me harder then I thought it would, she wanted to come out, and clearly she wanted me to be there to support her. I quickly stood up and got next to her, holding her hand after she silently asked to. 'I'm here for you', I softly whispered into Cristine's ear.

Liose was looking at us, scared to bit. Millions of thoughts seemed to run trough her mind, millions of scary, awful thoughts.

'Mom.. I'm trans', Grusha quickly said, making his mum's face become blank.

'What.?', she mumbled, making Grusha squeeze in my hand, reserving a small squeeze in return.

I still remembered how I came out. I just walked to my parents and told them I liked men. They both said they did too and it was cool. That was also the day I found out my dad was bi and my mum pan.

But this didn't seem like something that would become a story you would tell around the campfire for a good laugh.

Liose's hand slipped to the arceus metal around her neck. Then suddenly rage flew over her face as she ripped off the metal and threw it towards Grusha's face. I quickly snatched Grusha and pulled him out of reach for the metal, shielding him with my body before I felt the sharp point of it pierce into the skin of my neck. 'Get the fuck out of my house!'

In one swift motion I had pulled the metal out of my neck and threw it on the floor, making that cheap piece of crap break in multiple shards. 'Fine, bitch', I spit out the words like bitter food. Not often I swore, but if I do, I'm mad as fuck, like now.

I gently pulled Grusha with me, calling an air taxi, cursing out the living world out of the woman who just tried to harm their own child. 

'That awful, fucking, bitchy shithead excuse of a mother!', I shouted, seeing more than just red, I was seeing every shade of the primary colour.

But as soon as I heard Grusha sobbing next to me, my anger made way for worry. I quickly tried to put my arms around him, but he pushed me away. 'Grusha?'

'You keep getting hurt!'

'What do you mean?', I asked, completely confused.

'Every time you do something for me because I need to be protected or can't do it myself, you end up hurt'

'I'm no-'

'Then from where are those!' Grusha shouted, pointing at my arms, or more specifically the many white scars splattered across them.

'From when I went to safe your dad', I mumbled.

'And that', he pointed at my neck, with a small streak of crimson coloured blood running out the wound his excuse of a mother left.

'From when I protected you from your mother'

'See! You keep getting hurt because of me!'

'Grusha'

'I think it's better if we stopped talking', he mumbled, turning around to have his back facing me, and my heart breaking to bits.

'What.. why'

'Because you only keep getting hurt!' Grusha said, turning his head slightly to see him crying even more, 'I don't want you to get hurt..'

And then he just walked away, leaving me alone in the darkness.