I Don't Want to be Friends

008 Morse Code

𝔼𝕡𝕚𝕤𝕠𝕕𝕖 𝕋𝕙𝕣𝕖𝕖: 𝔼𝕖𝕤𝕥𝕨𝕒𝕪

"You did what!" Mila exclaims. I can't help but to smile. "We've honestly been in a really good place lately. AND his mom really likes me and invited me to dinner sometime this week." "This is soo cute. Have you told the rest of the group yet?" I get up from Camila's bed and start to walk around. "So, about that,-" "Ella, it's Monday, we have school in like an hour and you haven't told at least Darren?" "Well Amerie had a pretty shit Friday night and I didn't want to rub in her face how amazing mine was. Plus Quinni's only got good at the end. So, I just didn't want to brag." "No, I get it. But, if they truly loved you they wouldn't see it like that. Just like my weekend was shit cause I was sick and I didn't feel you were bragging". "I guess. But let's go before we're late".

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"Amerie, I should've told you. I just thought it was some weird graffiti that some random had put there." Qunni tells Amerie who is looking under the table in the SLT's classroom at the new sex map. "And now it takes an entire village of randos. I mean... Look at all the fresh little sluts getting up in here." Darren laughs. "Stop this one happened at Dusty's party" they say pointing at the table. "Speaking of Dusty's party..." I say causing Ams and Darren to slide out from the table. "I may have a little bit of a surprise." I tell them. "Ohh I love surprises, well the good kinds, not the bad ones. So I hope this isn't a bad one because I won't like it. Yet, it is coming from you so-" "Quinni, it's good news don't worry babe" I interrupt. "So... what is it then?" Amerie asks me nudging my arm.

I take a deep breath and start playing with my fingers. "Ant and I made it official". "Oh my gosh" Darren says. "That's so good. I'm so happy for you. How did it go down?" Qunni rambles excitedly. "Well, after the party, I think Dusty went to his room or the bathroom or something. So, I went to get Ant who was on the couch with Spider. I took Ant to my room, activities went down. Words were said and BOOM we're official."

I look over at Amerie whose face kind of dropped. "You alright babe?" I ask her. "No, yeah, no, I'm good. Happy for you really. But I kind of wanna make my own pact." "Oh and what exactly would that be?" Darren asks. "I am never ending up on that map again. I was obsessed with Dusty for like a bajillion years. And for what? I just ended up completely humiliated. I'm an idiot." "Ams..." I say. "No seriously. I don't even want to think about boys or sex or dicks for the next... however long it takes me to feel normal again. I'm not even gonna mazz." Amerie continued. "Ew, that sounds like my worst nightmare" Darren says. "Well, that's um great for you Ams really, and under different circumstances I'd agree and join but-" "No, no, it's for me so it's okay. A solo journey." Amerie adds. "Okay, but how does one not think about sex?" asks Qunni. "Umm I'll train myself. Yeah, every time I get a sexy thought, I'll slap myself in the face." Ams says with a slap in the face to prove her point. "Or a hobby!" Qunni suggests. "Yes, a hobby!" Ams agrees.

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"So we figured out when someone's into you, but that's just step one. Right? After that, we need to find out what they might be comfortable doing sexually. So, what are some ways of communicating with our partner in the space?" Miss Obah asks. To which Spencer raises his hand to say "Morse code... on her clitty". "Shut up Spider" I say rolling my eyes then seeing Ca$h throwing a paper ball at him. "No, but what about asking for guidance" Miss Obah redirects, "Something like... uh... show me where you want me to touch you." Anthony straightens his posture looks, and points down do his dick and says "here" which earned me hitting him in his torso. "Okay let's split into our designated groups and work through the consent exercises attached." Miss Obah directs.

"Amanda feels pressured to give it to him even though she doesn't feel the same way" Missy reads. "Convince her with a dick pic"? Spider suggests. "What did Amanda do to deserve that?" Malakai asks. "Well she'd have to zoom in to see yours" Spencer snaps back. Then the boys at the table start talking about how amazing their dicks are. As if that's something I want to hear. Mind you, Dusty is one of the boys there. Kill me now. It's moments like these that confuse me as to why I like Anthony. Either way the bell rang before we could even finish the assignment.

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"Ant calm down, why are you more nervous about this dinner than me?" "Because she's actually calming down and anything wrong can ruin it." "Yeah, but Mrs.Vaughn loves me, so we should be good." We walk into his bright blue house. "Good evening Mrs.Vaughn, it smells really good in here." "Darling, they're just burgers." "It may be, but my parents don't cook often. So I love the way a kitchen smells when it's in use."

In my opinion, the dinner went great. Mr.Vaughn came to join a little late because he was working. I don't quite know where I stand with him. All I do know, is that after I left, Anthony texted me that when he went to his room, his mom shut the door for him and he was really excited.