The Act|| Tarasia

Chapter Ninety Seven

Omniscient's POV

Danielle walked into the house, blocking her friend from leaving. She looked over Taraji's shoulder at all of the broken glass, assessing the mutilation of her kitchen. She didn't have to ask any questions to know that Taraji had defiled her own kitchen. She had seen her like this before, and it took her back to that time at the hotel in Atlanta when Taraji had destroyed her room and broken everything she could get her hands on after a nasty fight with Fantasia. The younger woman didn't want her friend going back down that destructive path, not after she had worked so hard to grow and find her own happiness. She thought about calling Fantasia, but would Taraji want her fiancé to see her like this? Danielle was lost on how to go about fixing the situation, so she did the one thing that she's always good at doing. She gave Taraji a big, comforting hug and allowed the older woman to melt into her body as she cried on her shoulder. She used one hand to rub her back and the other to stroke her hair.

Danielle: I'm not even gonna ask. Just take as many breaths as you need, relax, I'll make you some tea and clean up this mess.

Taraji: No, don't clean it up. Leave it.

Danielle: Taraji, you're gonna hurt yourself with all this broken glass laying around.

Taraji: I can't hurt myself any worse than other people have hurt me. I'm tired of being generous and getting taken advantage of. I'm tired of being the victim for every villain. It seems like the only way I'll stop getting hurt is if I start hurting people. I'll be that cold, soulless bitch that everybody wants me to be.

Danielle: Changing yourself won't change how evil the world is. It will only make you apart of the evilness.

Taraji: I don't give a fuck about any of that. I wanna be the one to do some damage for once.

Danielle: And just what exactly do you plan to do, Taraji? You're talking reckless, but what are you gonna do?

Taraji: I don't know. For once I just don't want to be on the receiving end of the pain.

Danielle: That doesn't mean you have to be on the giving end. Do you want me to call Fantasia? I don't know how I'm supposed to calm you down right now.

Taraji: You can't, so don't try. Don't call Fantasia, either. I don't ever want her to see me like this again.

Danielle: Taraji, I don't know what you want me to do.

Taraji: I don't either.

After angrily pacing the floor back and forth the entire time that she was talking to Danielle, Taraji finally sat down at the kitchen island, which secretly calmed Danielle's trembling nerves, but only a little. She had only come over to talk with Taraji about her mental health struggles and maybe even wedding plans for her and Fantasia. She didn't anticipate that she would walk into Taraji's breakdown. She stared at Taraji for a long second, trying to see if she was going to break anything else. When Taraji remained sitting still with a stone cold look on her face, Danielle felt safe enough to turn around to the stove and start brewing a pot of honey and lemon tea.

Taraji: I should expect it by now.

Danielle jumped, startled by Taraji's sudden break of her self-imposed silence.

Danielle: Expect what?

Taraji: To be heart broken and screwed over by everybody who comes into my life.

Danielle: Taraji, that's not true.

Taraji: I guess you're right. You've never hurt me.

Taraji's voice suddenly sounded closer. Danielle slowly turned, coming face to face and chest to chest with the older woman. She sucked in a breath, knowing what this was and how catastrophic it could be. They've been in this place before, and Taraji was just as enraged and destructive then as she is now.

Danielle: Taraji, no. You don't wanna do this.

Taraji: I don't know what I want to do, Dani.

Danielle: You're trying to hurt anybody that you can because you're hurting, but that person doesn't need to be Fantasia. What happened to make you act like this? This is even worse than the last time.

Taraji: How am I supposed to act, Dani? Please tell me because I have no idea. What is someone supposed to do when they've been broken so much that they feel like they'll never fix themselves. If you have a suggestion, I would love to hear it. Do you know why I push people away when I'm angry? It's because they can't do anything to me if I don't let them close enough to.

Danielle: I'm so sorry you've been wronged so much that you have to think like that.

Taraji stared into Danielle's sincere chocolate eyes, taking a step back. Her eyes flitted over her full, curvy figure. She wasn't attracted to her friend by any means, but she was seeing her differently because she felt seen by her. She knew that calling Fantasia would make the situation better, but she didn't want it to be better. She didn't want to move past how scorned and angry she felt. She wanted to remember this feeling, as painful as it was, she wanted to remember it.

Danielle: Let's talk about the wedding.

Taraji: Why?

Danielle: The direction of your energy needs to change.

Taraji: What if I don't want it to change? What if I want to stay stuck in this pain and remember it for the rest of my life so that it won't happen to me again?

Danielle: Tasia said that you want Beyoncé to perform at the wedding. Which song? 1+1?

Taraji: No, that's too basic. I want her to sing Smash Into You.

Danielle: That's a beautiful choice. Are you leaning more towards an outdoor or an indoor venue?

Taraji: I haven't thought much about that. I honestly wouldn't care if we got married in a bathroom. I do know that I want there to be lots and lots of flowers everywhere. Fantasia's extra ass wants an ice sculpture of us.

Danielle could see the tension slowly leaving Taraji's shoulders, and she was actually smiling as she talked about marrying the love of her life. She no longer looked like she wanted to burn the world down to the ground. However, Danielle knew that their conversation about wedding planning would come to an end soon, and that would only leave room for more anger.