Kyle "Gaz" Garrick x M!Reader

Nine

"Holy shit...", you huffed. "Where do I even start?"

Mildly upset, Kyle placed his hands on the surface of the kitchen island and gestured for this entire mess to make sense.

"That's a good question like...", he hesitated, frowned and looked at you. "I thought you were gay."

It wasn't even the fact that you had two sons with a woman that everyone only remembered as Crack Kimmy that upset him. He had gone all the years through school with you while wholeheartedly believing that women weren't a point of interest to you.

"Fair.", you said drily and poured yourself some more wine.

"You're not gay?", he asked again, eyes narrowed.

"I thought I wasn't."

"You never had a girlfriend."

"Yeah I did. Ellie in year eleven.", you shrugged.

Again, he hesitated, dug around in his memory in hopes of finding a face to the name you referred to. And indeed, the brown of his eyes lit up.

"I thought you dated her to make me jealous.", he suddenly blurted out, frowning.

You frowned too.

"Why the hell would I do that?", you shrugged, chuckling while gritting your teeth to stifle a hysterical laugh. "What the hell, Kyle?"

A slight simmer of embarrassment crossed his eyes. Sucking in a sharp breath, he downed his wine and reached for the bottle to have some more.

He emptied that glass in one swift go as well before he was able to look you in the eyes again. This time his eyelids seemed heavier.

"Cause I did that.", he admitted and hid his face in embarrassment. "I dated... Melissa?"

"Her name was Nancy."

"Was it?!", he groaned, threw his head back and let out such a loud sigh that it made you laugh.

"Are you bloody serious, mate?", you asked, barely able to form words.

"Don't judge me!", he pointed at you. "At the time I thought you were gay!"

"So your response was to... date a woman?"

"No...", a little more serious now he lowered his gaze to examine your expression. "I- bloody hell, why do I have to explain myself now, YOU are supposed to tell me how it happened that you shagged a woman."

Throwing his arms into the air, he showed you his frustration. But you couldn't help and just broke down, tears in your eyes while laughter gave you a stomach ache.

Your lungs rattled and the wine made your head feel light. Yet at the same time everything felt so good. So natural. He was still the same messy guy, unable to explain himself in a proper manner without making an absolute fool of himself.

"Christ on a stick!", a violent cough forced you to clear your throat.

Breathless, you held onto the counter for dear life while wiping away the tears of amusement that shimmered in the corners of your eyes.

His teeth gritted, Kyle stared you down. A mix of embarrassment and annoyance was visible on his face.

"Seriously, mate, I had such a fat crush on you in college!", he blurted out, giving you a punch to the shoulder. "I was so mad when you dated her."

Playfully, you leaned over the island, wiggling your eyebrows.

"I'm single by the way.", you joked.

"Had a crush.", Kyle shoved his hand straight into your face to push you back where you had come from. "HAD."

Snorting, you needed to catch your breath.

"Yeah for sure. I'll just believe that.", arms crossed in front of your chest, you shrugged and sighed. "Anyways, I'm a total faggot."

"You have kids??", defeated, Kyle sighed. "With a woman??"

"Yeah... about that.", crunching your nose, you scratched your chin and shrugged. "I thought I was bi until like the end of school. But after that I realised that women just never were the thing for me, ya know."

"So how did Kimmy happen?"

"Uuuh, yeaaaahh. Let's just say I tried to get my act together. Kimmy wanted that too, so one thing led to another and... I dunno. It worked. Kinda."

Ruffling his hair, Kyle buried his face between his arms and let out a groan of frustration.

"You're a mess, mate!", he sighed. Bloody hell.

"Obviously.", with a sigh, you reached for the bottle to pour yourself another glass and then dumped the rest into his. "I was for years, lazy, sat on my ass and did nothing. Besides that I was... existing. Sometimes I helped out in the bakery but it wasn't a real job."

Kyle took a sip of his wine. The brown of his eyes seemed to darken with thoughts. For a brief moment he watched his own reflection on the red surface.

"And Kimmy?", he looked up to check your reaction.

You sighed, then had to wipe your eyes.

"She was herself. Parties, getting blackout drunk every night. Drugs.", you took a sip. "As soon as she got pregnant I got my shit together. Started full time in the bakery, did my training. Got certified. All the works."

He huffed in disbelief, shook his head.

"I can't believe it man...", he muttered more to himself.

Your eyebrows rose in agreement.

"Yeah... I... it worked for a while. It was good. She got sober, second one came. And by the time Matthias was here everything was... normal.", you did a gesture to show him the house. "The lady passed, I inherited the bakery with all the clients. I... bought this place two years ago, fixed it up. I really hoped Kimmy would get her shit together like I did and we could be happy... pretending."

Kyle frowned.

"Pretending?", he asked.

You huffed.

"She didn't love me, Kyle. She's Kimberly J. I was surprised she came back for seconds after Elliot.", you sucked in a sharp breath, had to remind yourself you had fault in this too. "And I didn't love her either. I was just lying to myself. And once Elliot was here I couldn't back out no more. He deserved a dad."

"So your best shot was to have a second?", tired, he nipped on his wine.

You shrugged.

"Well... I'm still a fucking mess. Nothing changed. A lot. But in the end... nothing, really."