Punk & Metal

I Feel My Body Getting Colder

"Son can you hear me?"

The lights are bright.

"Son you're gonna be alright, just relax, you're okay."

Blake..

"You're safe now."

........................

/\___/\___/\___

I woke up in a white walled room. The clean smell made me cough, and to my left outside the window I could tell I was on a high floor. I looked to the right and on my stand there was a note. I couldn't exactly read it because my vision was still blurry. I tried to get up but that's when the pain hit me. I fell to my back again with a groan, and checked my leg. There was a bandage around my thigh, and looking at it made me sick.

Here I am, stuck in a hospital bed with a bullet wound and Blake could be waking up right now.

Blake...and Luke.

It flashed in my mind the last conversation me and Luke had. And I no longer felt upset, I felt guilt. I shouldn't have snapped at him that way, and the bullet was most likely karma biting me in the butt. However, he did kiss my girlfriend, so I had rights.

Outside my door I could hear murmurs of voices. Specifically, Ashton's. I sighed and waited for him to come in with that look on his face. Sure enough, he came in silent with his arms crossed.

"I can explain."

"No, shut up, I heard it all from the police and the doctor."

"Ashton-"

"WHAT THE HELL MICHAEL!"

I was able to roll up and sit against the headboard.

"Look I didn't do anything."

"I know!"

"Then why are you pissed?!"

"Cause you had to go off all angry and then this happened to you!"

"It's just a shot."

He scoffed and moved closer to my bed, "Oh, yeah, 'A bullet just flew through my flesh, no biggie.'"

I rolled my eyes. "Michael, you can't be this way. I know you're upset about Luke and Blake, but you gotta chill out."

"How can I chill out? I have no right to be upset?"

"You do but, not like this." I crumbled and let myself cry. Ashton sat on the bed and pulled me into his chest. I cried as he held me tight, the way I imagined an older brother would.

"It's okay, it's okay." Ashton stayed with me for a while and told me a few things that happened after I stormed out.

Calum had a panic attack and is currently sitting in his room sleeping. Luke had gone to see Julia and Ashton came as soon as he got the call. He left after about an hour and I was by myself again. The clock was getting ready to tick to midnight.

I was wishing I had Blake with me, telling me I'd be okay, but at the same time I didn't. Was she truly thinking of me when we were together? Did she kiss back because she wanted to? I had a lot of questions. But being stuck in a hospital bed and having your girlfriend in a coma wasn't very helpful.

I decided I'd go to sleep, and try to figure out what to do if she woke up, and when I got out of this bed.

~~~

LUKE POV

"Julia, I know you're inside."

"Go away," she screamed through the door. I stayed, and continue to softly knock. She eventually opened up, and I came in. She hugged herself in her pink pajama shorts and red tank top.

"Can we talk?"

"About what."

"Blake."

"What is there to talk about?"

"Look, Julia, you're super cool, but I can't be with you."

Her arms fell to her side, and her big hazel eyes widened, "What," she whispered.

"I'm sorry."

"You're breaking up with me?"

"I love someone else."

"Blake?"

I nodded. She covered her face and fell against the wall crying.

"Please, don't cry Julia."

"I knew it."

"What?"

"The way you look at her, you don't look at me that way," she laughed, "You sound just like Wyatt."

"What?"

"Never mind, just leave Luke."

I walked out her door and made my way back to the apartment. Ashton had just got home and was taking a shower, Calum was still locked in his room, and Michael was in the hospital. Do I feel bad? Yeah. I miss him. I love Michael, and I feel like crap for doing this to him, but it happened. I'm not asking for immediate forgiveness, but I'm asking for civil treatment.

I wanted to go see him, but Ashton told me not to go. He said that he may be injured, but he'll still kick my ass. And I believe him.

I tried playing my guitar, just to distract myself from everything, but it was no use. Every note I played sounded flat, every string was out of tune, every melody was depressing. Everything I touched got ruined.

I don't think I had done something so horrible. It's usually the girls who cheat on me, but now? I don't know what to do.

Calum was practically going crazy, Michael wants to kill me, Wesley is between life and death, and I doubt Julia wants to talk about anything with me. The only man left was daddy.

"Ashton, you done?"

"Yeah," he walked out of the bathroom drying his wavy curly hair out.

"What's up?"

"I need to talk to you."

"Everyone seems to want to talk to me lately."

"Haha, yeah."

"What'd you need?"

"What do I do? Michael, Julia, and possibly even Blake hate me."

"I say you do what you think is right."

"That's horrible advice."

"It's broad advice. Look I do want to help, but I promised Calum I'd grab him some chips from the store."

"Oh, okay."

Ashton grabbed his wallet and keys and left. It was rolling around 2 am and I was clueless.

Maybe I should've been hit by a truck, gotten shot in the leg, have a nervous breakdown, or maybe I'm Wyatt's lost twin. I don't know what to do with myself, but right now I know that I hate myself. And Michael was right. Him and his girlfriends usually break up because something happens between me and them, but I've never really thought of it until now. But I haven't cared since now. Yeah sure, it sucks that those other girls weren't loyal but, I didn't like them back. They kissed me and thought that it was meant to be. And that's not how I roll. They were really fake girls, and even Michael knew it. But Blake? Dear Lord Jesus she has us whipped. I saw the way Michael looked at her, and I instantly knew what he was thinking.

Thing is, I'm thinking the same thing.

Blake is the girl you meet who puts you back together after all the girls have taken little bits and pieces of you. She's the thing called "love at first sight".

I want her so bad.

But I don't deserve her. So when she wakes up, it's Michael's move.