Say You Love Me

Chapter 11

The first thought that came to me wasn't that he could have an STD, it was that I could become pregnant. I try really hard not to lament on having children. I remembered telling my mother how I hated kids, and never wanted one of those spawns of Satan crawling out my uterus, I remembered clearly what she said to me; "when the right person comes along, they'll make you want to have kids, until then, don't close off your mind to it." It's a pity that if I ever do have them, they'll never know the goddess that was my mother.

"I-I, umm, I'm really sorry Katelena," Dean stuttered out rubbing the nape of his neck, clearly a nervous habit. "God, I hope you're clean," I said, more to myself than to him. We exited the cubicle and I washed my hands at the sink. Dean glared at me, clearly offended, "Just so you know,I don't just go about sticking my dick in every woman that comes along," he stormed out of the bathroom, radiating anger and hurt.
I went back to our table to see a brooding Dean texting on his phone. I sat next to him and he shifted slightly. Ouch.
"Dean?" I said hesitantly. When he didn't respond I continued, "I didn't mean to offend you, it's just that, I-um, uhh" I couldn't seem to manage to spit it out, "You what, Katelena?" The slight anger in his voice made me hesitant to continue. "My birth control ran out a week ago and I forgot to go to the pharmacy, and I hope I'm not pregnant. I mean I don't know about the whole motherhood thing, it actually scares the crap out of me," the words flew out of me so fast that I was panting, "Katelena shut up, just shut up, okay?"

My eyes widened in shock. Who the fuck did he think he was talking to?

"We'll just get you tested, and if you're pregnant,well then you're pregnant." His tone blasé. "I pray to God, I'm not," I said, more to myself. He gave me a questioning look, goading me to continue, so I did. "Besides fear, I'd make such a shitty mother." Seemed like I had verbal diarrhea around him. Dean came closer to me reassuring me that I'd make an excellent, caring mother. I scoffed, at only twenty- four years old, I was too young to fork out some big-headed fiend. "Just take me back to work," I grumbled.

Dean begrudgingly requested the check and paid with the swipe of his credit card.
It was baffling how after such amazing sex, our moods could turn sour, just at the thought of bringing a child into this God-forsaken world. That's what kids did, caused separation and grief. I witnessed that first hand with my parents. Where was my father? Only God knew where that lousy excuse for a man was.

I entered my office, with an angry boss in my chair. "Fifteen minutes late.Tsk, tsk, tsk." he said shaking his head condescendingly. "What's, your excuse Ms. Harper? You missed the meeting" His tone was acid; his grey orbs hardened.
The reason I'm late? Oh I was too busy fucking my hot boyfriend in a bathroom stall.
I couldn't tell my boss that, besides being extremely crude, it would be profoundly unprofessional. Instead I thought up an easy lie "Sorry but my monthly came and I was totally not expecting it, Sir. So I had to rectify the problem." Mr. Johnson couldn't get out of there fast enough, his face the color of a cherry. Pussy.

Why couldn't all men be like Kris? When we lived with mom, he was the one who got out of bed at one in the morning, just to get me ice-cream and any other sweets I craved. Kris' an angel, just like mom. Lethal mood swings and irksome cramps didn't desist Kris. I remembered telling him he must've been born a woman,that he was too empathetic and didn't seem to mind. This was not the case, however, he did mind, he just loved us enough to suck it up. I'd crawl to Hell on my all fours, battle Satan and drag his vile ass out if Kris asked me too. Anything for my baby brother.

My phone vibrated showing a message from Dean we need to talk. I let out a loud groan 'we need to talk's never resulted in anything good.