Say You Love Me

Chapter 21

"What the fuck are you doing here?" I said pointing at the figure before me.

"Watch your language young lady. I'm here for the same reason you are." The figure stated, voice filled with authority.

I scoffed, "You weren't even at the funeral, you hypocrite!"

"Say you didn't see me, not that I wasn't there, because I was Katy."

"Don't call me that," I retorted through gritted teeth. The anger was boiling up inside me rapidly. "How dare you come here, Adrian? How dare you?" I exclaimed.

"Wow....Adrian? Can't even call me dad Katy?" his face morphed into one of shock, as his grey brows arched upwards as he chuckled sardonically.

"You lost that title ever since you left us."
Adrian Harper took a calculated step towards me, with his hands
outstretched.

I took up my handbag and walked around him, heading out of the graveyard. He grabbed my arm and brought me back to him.

"Don't be so callous, Katelena, I just want to talk."

"Talk?" I scoffed, yanking my arm from his firm grip, "You could've talked to me six years ago, but not now."

"Katelena, please. I'm truly sorry but you know I don't do anything without a reason."

"Then what is the reason you're here, 'Dad'?" I asked through gritted teeth.

"I want to make amends, obviously. This is by pure coincidence that I saw you here but I have been keeping tabs on you and your brother all these years."

"So you've been stalking us?" I asked, letting out a mechanical laugh. "You're a piece of shit!" I spat.

"Please, Katy. Just please allow me to at least try. Have coffee with me, let's just talk, please? For old times' sake?" His wrinkled face pulling up into a pleading smile.

"Fine." I retorted flatly. A part of me just wanted closure, I wanted to know why he left his family; his home. I was curious, I wanted to hear what my father, and I use that loosely, had to say.

I followed him to a small café, trailing behind him in my Toyota. His minivan, the stereotypical soccer mom minivan, moving swiftly to Sol Café.

He got out and waited by the entrance, but I sat in my car, contemplating if to really hear him out. I dialed Dean's number and he picked up on the second ring.

"Hey babe." I could hear the grin in his voice and Beau's bark in the
background. I rambled off the entire situation to him and he listened quietly.
When I was finished he said, "It couldn't hurt to hear what he has to say and it'd provide some insight as to why he left," his voice solemn. I sighed, "Thanks."

I disconnected the call and got out the car with my handbag. I smoothed my grey pencil dress over and walked over to him. He smiled a relieved smile and ushered me inside, sitting at a four-seater booth in the back. I peered out the glass of the café, sitting opposite him and waiting for him to initiate the conversation.

"I'm sorry for my sudden departure but you must know I wasn't in well. I gambled away the money your mother and I saved for you guys within two weeks. I had an addiction, Catherine was mad at me but still stayed. She wanted you guys to have a dad, but I couldn't be a bad influence on you all, I wasn't someone who you could be proud to call your dad. So I left."

"That's the stupidest excuse I've ever heard! You left just because you lost a couple hundred dollars?" I shouted. The occupants of the café looked at me, they registered my little outburst, causing me to turn red with embarrassment.

"It was about forty-five grand, Katy. You can't even fathom how terrible I felt. If I hadn't gambled off that money, you wouldn't have to fork out so much money for Kris' tuition, now would you? Or Catherine wouldn't have had to struggle with yours."

"Fair enough," I muttered, "however, it still didn't give you the right to abandon us. I get that you felt guilty and all, but you can't understand how shitty you made us feel. And why now? Why show up now, you sick or somethin'?"

He emitted a shaky chuckle, "Not that I know of but the guilt certainly has taken its toll on me," he said, gesturing to his plump physique.
Alike me, my father ate when he was depressed or in this case guilt-ridden. Adrian now had a full grey head of hair, styled into a buzz cut. He had that hair cut ever since he was in the navy when we were little.

His topaz eyes lay under his bushy grey eyebrows. Despite his greying facial hair, the years treated Adrian with kindness. His slightly wrinkled face looked at me with the love I remembered him showing to us as children. The tan skin he had was slightly paler, suggesting a lack of sun. He ran his hand up and down his left arm, clothed in a long-sleeved olive green shirt. He figgeted in his seat nervously under my intense glare.

"At least your hair is black now," he laughed out.
He was referring to the time when I was around fifteen, I dyed my hair in bright colors against my mother's wishes. He secretly hated it but allowed me to transition through that awkward phase. Thank God that passed. I mean blue hair was cool and all but the nicknames 'Marge' and 'Katy Perry' stuck throughout the rest of my high school life.

My mouth upturned into a reluctant smile and he smiled in victory.

"Look, I can't say I fully forgive you or anything but I'm willing to give you a chance."

He smiled triumphantly, exhaling a relieved sigh, "Thank you Katy."

I may still feel hurt but my father has always been able to break down my shield, forcing me to let him in. But this time, it'll take a long time to get to know me again, and our relationship cannot be mended so that it is the same as before, it'll never be the same again.

"Where even were you, Adrian?"

He flinched at my harsh tone. "For the first year I was still here then I moved to somewhere in Alaska, then in Montreal, look Katelena, that's the past, I want to focus on the future, hopefully one that involves my children and I."

"Well, unfortunately for you, the past influences the future, so I can't promise you anything." I stated matter-of-factly.

"Fair enough," Adrian murmured.

"Did you talk to Kris?"

"No, I figured I'd try you first, since he's harder to get around and might resort to violence."

I laughed whole-heartedly since I knew that to be true. Kris was more hurt by our father's leaving because he was younger at the time, and needed a male figure in his life that was never there.

"I'm hoping you would arrange for your brother to reconnect with his father?"

"I think you're asking for too much. You're the one who wants to talk to him, so you," I pointed to him, "should organise that, not me," I gestured to myself. "Although I'd be happy to forewarn my baby brother of his neglectful father's arrival," smiling sweetly.

He sucked his teeth and rolled his topaz eyes at my insincere smile.
I chuckled at his childish antics, this was the part of him I somewhat loved and cherished.

"Well this has been lovely, dad, but I have somewhere to be."

"Going to visit a Mr.West, Katy?" he chuckled knowingly.

"How do you..." I started but then I remembered he's been 'keeping tabs on me'
"Well, yes, I suppose but I see your stalking knows no bounds, till next time."

"Thank you, Katy. And I mean it" he said as he waved me out of the café.