Mind Games ♟

Chapter 1 : Beginnings

They say envy's the best form of flattery. But in my world that is the best dreadful feeling ever. You wanna know why? Well because it drives you mad; it makes say and do crazy things. Crazy things like hurting yourself, blaming yourself for mistakes others made. But it's so satisfying to the ones that think they've won. No one admires you. But for the ones who aren't being admired, we pretend to be them, and we love it.

 Commending the people we'd want to be, envying them to no point of return it annoys you. You wish it never started but you can never control what happens. Well, that's what I tell myself at least. I wasn't always like this you know. It all started when I was ten, and that's when it was minor. My cousin Chanel was my biggest idol, not really, everyone idolized her so I pretended to. She was at least a year younger than me by a couple of months and yet I couldn't stand it. She'd be my best friend, they'd say. But we all know how that turned out. Anyways despite what she may think I do, love her in my own twisted way...But she'd always ditch me for her friends and she'd always have that favorite line. Now I wouldn't say I was envious of that because I was always used to being alone or left alone. He did this for me and we all know she deserved it.

September 2, 2015,

I got up for another school year at Mackinze's high school where I attended, for now, two years. I waved my parents goodbye as usual and went on about my business. I arrived at school and I'd see her, we'd say hi and then go on about our business. 

"Nicole." My friend Alyssa said as she approached me. I'd give her a hug and a fake smile cause I hated smiling so I adapted to a natural bitch face. Alyssa was considered one of my best friends, or I guess it was in fact pity, everyone pity's me because I allow them to. The thing is I don't really let anyone close to me unless you make me laugh, which isn't hard to do.

"So how was your summer?" I asked her.

"Good, and you?" Alyssa replied. "fine I guess. Wait have you seen."-

I paused in mid-sentence as Alyssa was literally swept off her feet and taken away from me by her boyfriend, who I had a crush on freshman year but I knew It wasn't going to ever happen, I mean look at her, she was way hotter than me...I was basically, basic. 

"I guess I'll go," I said turning my body around and walking off. And then there he was the guy who started it all. My guy best friend if I recall. He was so tall, muscular with his wavy dark hair and those still blue eyes. His name was Stefan Cage. I really loved his name, the way it just rolled off my tongue. He was the sweetest guy you'd ever meet. Stretching out his arm in a hug form I embraced him.

 "I was just talking about you," I said as if that made me less of a girl with a crush.

 "Well, kind of," I said playing it off with an awkward chuckle. 

"Sure, you were. Anyways let me walk you to class, Ms. Tyler."

I wish I was outspoken you know, I want to tell him and everyone in general how I feel but I don't because I am too afraid of what they might think of me and I shouldn't. I wanted the right attention however,  I didn't want to be noticed.

 "Thinking again?" Stefan implies as if he didn't know that I was. 

"Yeah sorry, I can't help myself," I said rubbing my arm. Stefan stops me in mid tracks and steps in my way. Cupping my chin he looks deeply into my eyes.

"You know what? This year is gonna be epic, trust me." I sighed, ignoring his so-called pep talk, Stefan wraps his arm around my shoulder.

 "Don't frown smile, don't let whatever it is, get to you." 

I smirk with a side of blush which draws Stefan's attention towards his phone. 

"Was my smirk that bad?" I asked worrying like I always do.

 He shrugs, "look I'm sorry I was supposed to go meet up with my girlfriend and I forgot." Girlfriend? "Girlfriend? Since when."-

"We'll talk later." He interrupts me before running off. Luckily I was just a step away from my first class which was chemistry, something I didn't have. Just as I thought people were starting to notice me I was overlooked by my freckled, light-skinned cousin, I mean look at her... She's beautiful the total package. A guy's societal dream.  

Unknown

let's have some fun with the truth

wow, another Pretty Little Liar clichè. I loved that show as much as I loved my sarcasm and that's saying something.

At lunch, I walked around looking to find which clique I would fit in with which was none because I couldn't give a damn about them, and the same to me and we all know why. It was always one vs all, the only time I was acknowledged was when someone needed my help in class or whatever. No one understood me not even my own family. I felt like a total outcast to them because I was different.

Now at this point I thought a fight had broken out because usually, I get a text from the entire student body about a fight, yeah I can do this it's a very exaggerated story.

Unknown

Let me fill you in on a little secret my pretty. The one you think that hates you the most will kill you the least...

What does that even mean? I turn to look around at the hundreds of kids that looked up from their phones to stare at me as if I had a sign on my back that read 'I am stupid.' 

"What's going on?" I asked as Alyssa ran charging at me, she bothers to say nothing before rising her phone up to my face for me to see Stefan and Chanel exploited together, they seemed to be sneaking into her house and then they shared a kiss. 

"This is crazy, that psycho was not kissing me but then again when you hang out with a psycho you become one."

I rolled my eyes, you have one outburst and you're suddenly a psycho. The credit read, 'this was for you, Nicole.'

With rage and anger raging through me I shove her phone from out my face and make my way outside into the courtyard. I stumbled upon Stefan being shoved and punched all at once by a group of basically jocks. Was it wrong to say he deserved it? Derek our typical bad boy was Chanel's so-called boyfriend and he was just as the biggest asshole ever. I finally get the courage to say something, "stop!" I said jumping in between them.

 "Why should we? You and your bitch over there are loons." Derek implies. I laughed, shaking off the fact that he called me crazy. 

"Oh, I had nothing to do with what he's done with my cousin."

 Derek pushed me back a few steps. 

"Don't...ugh!" Stefan groans as Derek punches him in the gut. Once I've gotten back my balance I slapped Derek in the face. His friends laugh as he wipes his face.

 "Derek don't."-

"shut up!" Derek yelled before getting ready for another punch until the principal showed up and Derek and his friends ran away.

 "Alright, Stefan let's go." Stefan gives me one more glance before he was taken away.