The Original High (Koli) ✔️

18: What's Wrong With Me?

Back inside the apartment, water dripping off us from the rain, I quickly went to grab both Oli and me a towel to dry off. "You're taller than me, obviously. . . but maybe you can borrow some of my oversized clothes. They should be in the other room." I suggested with a chuckle as I dried my hair.

Oli nodded and went off to look for some clothes. I then went into my own room and tried to wiggle myself out of my wet skinny jeans and shirt, which were clinging to my body. Just as I slipped out of my underwear, I heard Oli walking in.

"I didn't think that it was possible, but your clothes are even tinier than Vic's." He stated with a chuckle.

I blushed a deep red as I quickly covered myself up. Oli looked over, watching me hug my arms around my lower half as his eyed widened. "Sorry." He muttered, quickly looking away.

I bit my lip and frowned for a moment. "It's okay." I then somehow said, not entirely sure why I was so okay with it. "But yeah, you're right, some of my pants are actually from the kiddy section at Target." I admitted with a giggle.

It was only then that I looked up at Oli, seeing he was just in his boxers and one of my many oversized plain black shirts. At least I got those from the adult section. I then turned my back towards Oli and quickly grabbed a shirt.

Just as I was about to put it over my head, I felt Oli's hands gently slide down my arms, making the shirt drop to the ground again. In the shadow of the bedroom light I saw him take off his own shirt too, or mine technically speaking, before he then snaked his arms around my waist and left a trail of kisses on my shoulder. I practically melted right into him in that moment.

"Stay with me, Oli." I then whispered softly, noticing my voice crack.

"I'm here, aren't I?" He pointed out in a whisper, his hot breath pouring down my neck.

"No I mean. . . stay with me." I didn't really know how else to put it. I just knew that I wanted to be with him. I didn't want to be alone anymore.

We had been together for a couple of months now. And so far the only type of intimacy we'd shared was the occasional make-out session. Oli had been so incredibly patient with me. . . I thought it was time to repay him for that.

I turned around in his hold and wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling him down a bit to kiss him. Instantly he kissed me back and started to walk carefully, until the back of my legs hit the edge of the bed. He held me close as he dipped me backwards, gently lying me down and crawling on top of me.

His lips then left mine and trailed down my neck in the search for my weak spot. When he found it, a soft gasp escaped my lips.

Oli then kicked off his boxers and mentally asked me for the essentials, so I just nodded in the direction of my nightstand, hoping he'd pick the right drawer and not end up going trough my medication.

That would just kill the mood.

He pulled a condom and a bottle of lube from the drawer- something I had plenty of. Oli lathered his fingers with a generous amount and carefully pressed two fingers to my entrance. I gasped as I felt them enter, somewhat surprised by the feeling.

Most guys I had slept with didn't even bother to prep me. They always just made it all about them.

After Oli figured that I was ready, he rolled the condom onto himself and slowly slid inside me. His thrusts were slow and gentle. Our tongues danced in each other's mouths as I ran a hand through his hair and the other down his back.

He eased himself in and out with care, groaning softly into my mouth every time. I deepened the kiss, waiting to feel something. . . anything. I waited for him to hit that specific spot that would drive me crazy. . .

But nothing happened.

A good ten minutes passed by as I started to feel Oli's body tremble slightly. His thrusts quickened a bit and got sloppier by the second. All too soon he then groaned and released.

Panting lightly, he pulled out, got rid of the condom and dropped himself down beside me with a huge smile on his face.

As I pulled the covers over us, I stayed quiet. Oli then held me closely and nuzzled my neck, as his hand slowly traveled downward. "We weren't done yet, love. I'm not just going to leave you hanging like that." He whispered seductively.

It was a nice gesture, but I just didn't feel like it anymore.

I tried to smile convincingly and left a quick peck on his cheek, not saying a word as I pushed his hand away. I was happy that he was satisfied. I was content with him finally getting off. But it really bothered me that for some reason. . . I just didn't really enjoy it.

After all this time of waiting, I at least expected it to feel amazing. But it didn't.

I kind of figured that I was to blame though.

What was wrong with me?

It wasn't long before Oli fell asleep. I sighed softly, still wide-awake. I carefully crawled out of bed and silently left the room. Was I going to tell him about this? Part of me didn't want to. . . our relationship was often difficult enough being how I was.

I lit myself a cigarette and plumped down on the couch with a deep sigh. "What. . . the Hell. . . is wrong. . . with me?!" I snarled between gritted teeth, punching the seat of the couch as I spat every few words. A tear of frustration escaped my eye as I dragged the smoke from my cigarette like my life depended on it.

After a while of just sitting there, I had convinced myself that it were just the nerves that probably blocked everything out. That had to be it, right?

I sighed again and slid downward until I was lying down on the couch. "Next time will be better." I muttered softly to myself as I drifted off to sleep.