Ride or Die {Book 1} ✔️

Chapter 15: This Is What Teen Girls Go Through. "That Year"

Chapter 15: This Is What Teen Girls Go Through. "That Year"

My eyes were dried out as we sat in the empty coffee shop called Starbucks. The cashier didn't give as a second glance, only left back into the kitchen without turning back. I stared blankly at the hot chocolate in the medium sized mug my cold hands were wrapped around. It sat on the wooden smooth table in front of me. In the booth next to me sat Evan who was extremely silent since he found me in the alley.

James had stayed behind, calling his people that were going to make sure the mess was cleaned up. All this explained to me as soon as we had ordered the hot chocolate.

Evan had asked what happened and I told him word by word, since it was forever plugged into my memory. Why was this happening to me? I saw how this worked in movies but never had I thought it'll leave me some numb. So dead. My hot chocolate had long since gotten cold and I hadn't taken a sip from it once. Poor Jeremy.

I didn't even know the guy all that well but it hurt me so much and so deep, seeing anyone die like that would have made me feel this way. My finger was on that trigger along with his. I had killed him. And every time that thought went through my head, my heart beat went pounded in my ears and my head went foggy.

Then I went numb.

I unwrapped my hands from the mug and covered my face. I couldn't even cry anymore. I wanted to, but I'd long since went dry. I was only seventeen years old, what was I supposed to do? Going to the cops was just plain stupid. I couldn't or I'll go to jail. They'll file me for murder and I'll be there for the rest of my life. They'll just find my fingerprints on that damn gun, on that fucking trigger.

And then it was all over. They wouldn't even believe my story, including the fact that I had no witnesses, it'll go downhill from there. And my father, he'll hate me, think poorly of me. I felt Evan's arm go around my shoulder and I turned toward him, bearing my face in his chest.

He was so warm, the smell of him filled my whole body. It comforted me, but not so much that I didn't still feel broken and terrible. Both his arms went around my shoulder and I felt his chin rest on top of my head.

"Kylie. I'm so sorry. If I'd stayed away from you, this wouldn't have happened. It's my fault you've had to go through this. I'm so sorry."

His chest vibrated when his deep voice came rumbled out with words. I took my hands off my face and pressed my cheek against his chest, listening to his fast and strong pounding heart. I wrapped my arms around him tightly and whispered.

"It's not your fault. It's not my fault. It just happened." I could feel him ready to deny it but I continued on talking, trying to convince myself more than anything, "There's nothing we can do about it now. We can't change we did. God knows, I wish I could. I shouldn't have come here, to Chicago."

That was right, I should have stayed back where I was. I never had so much pain mentally ever. I was overwhelmed with it and I felt like I was slowly drowning into a pit of nothing. Was this how Evan felt every day? Doing the same job Jeremy did? What risk did have to take? Why did he get involved in the first place? What was this dangerous job? I couldn't think of nothing but assassins and secret agents.

"Kylie..." Evan said, breathing out my name. His back stiffened as he let out a deep breath and began to speak again, "I used to be a normal teen, like any other kid you saw at school. But on my sixteenth birthday, my father... died."

I squeezed him tightly before relaxing my grip. What it must have been like, on your birthday for one of your parents to die? He took another breathe before continuing to speak, "A few days later I came home to people searching our house... My mother was locked in the bathroom and I saw a guy take some boxes of drugs out of my father's office room."