Unexpected

Chapter 45

Samantha's POV:

I feel like I have to turn around and look at Harry just to make it easier for him to talk to me, his voice sounds strange I've never hear him speak like that. I really want to turn around but I decide against it, I can't always give in whenever he is nice to me after he was a jerk.

He squeezes my hand again and I try not to move, his hand on my arm makes my heart pound even faster. I'm addicted to his touch. I hear him running his other hand through his hair and rubbing over his face before he takes another deep breath and sits up straight beside me on the bed.

“Okay well if you don't want to listen then don't but I'm going to tell you anyway” he says his voice is husky.

He sounds like he isn't okay and I want to encourage him and tell him that I'm listening to him but something ties my tongue together and I can't bring myself to speak the words.

“It isn't easy for me to talk about stuff like that” Harry adds and my stomach knots together.

He is really uncomfortable right now and I know if he starts to talk with me, it is something serious. I hear him running his hands through his hair and rubbing his hand over his face. He sighs several times and I really have to fight with myself not to give in and encourage him.

“Okay” he starts but stops again..

He can't find the words and I know without moving and without looking at him that his eyes look scared. He probably had them wide open and blinks more often than usual.

“Sam” he whispers and my heart leaps. I hate it seeing or hearing him like that but he has to think about it too and I don't want to give in as easy as I normally do. He hurt me and he promised me to chance and that he isn't embarrassed of me.

“I'm really sorry about what happened and I'm sorry how the fans treated you” he sighs and takes a deep breath “it is part of my job and this is normal for me” he adds.

I hold my breath, what is normal for him. Leaving me alone with crazy girls after telling me how much he loves me and going for a romantic and nice dinner?

“I should be used to Paparazzi and to crazy and jealous fans. I didn't know that all this would become my job as I started doing this more than three years ago. But it is now part of my job”

His hand tightens around my arm and I let out the breath I held.

“I never really cared about Management and what they told me to do.” he stops and scoops closer to me.

“I don't know if you read it in the newspapers or saw it on TV but in the last three years I never had a serious girl around me”

I almost laugh, I never heard of him. Maybe I saw him on some newspapers but I actually never paid any attention towards One Direction. It isn't the typical type of music if you dance ballet and my mother was always quite strict about what I listen to and what I read and which friends I was allowed to meet.

“Well, I guess people told you that I had quite a few girls whenever we were on tour”

My stomach knots tighter together and I don't want to hear it, I don't want to imagine how he told other girls the same stories he told me. I don't want to hear about how many he had. It just makes me feel uncomfortable about me being so inexperienced.

“I enjoy being famous and I get the girls easy but whenever I wanted to meet with someone after I fucked them management said no. I couldn't do something about it and I stopped caring. I stopped giving them my phone numbers and I stopped being nice to them. I fucked them and left them.” he sighs and I wish I could see his eyes but I'm too scared to turn around.