Its A Deal!

Mushy Feelings And Car Rides

After Amy dropped me off, promising to meet me along with Emma at Max's place, I quickly went to my room and ignoring the obvious dread in my stomach started getting ready.

I didn't do parties, not usually at least. But I knew how to get ready for one, thanks to my best friend Emma.

Being an artist (like her mom) she made me attend a few (lot!) of fancy gallery openings and her moms functions too.

Trust me, jeans and hoodies were so not their dress codes.

Max 's party though a hyped one, seemed like a casual gathering of over enthusiastic drunk teenagers.. So my go to outfit had to be sensible, yet stylish.

After rummaging through my closet for a while I finally decided on my very first choice.

I slipped into black ripped jeans and a fancy white and gold halter neck  top that Amy had lent me.
I ironed my hair a little, leaving their natural curly texture towards the ends, untouched. After pairing my white gold hoops with the outfit and putting on some eyeliner and lip gloss, I pulled on my black boots and picked up my phone from the side table.

It was 8 pm already.
Chris would be here any minute.

Mom was out of town again, for some seminar, so curfew wasn't exactly my problem.
But I had this weird feeling.

Like a mixture of dread and fear along with uncertainty, it was like this ball of emotion in the pit of my stomach.

Chris and I had been fake dating for a while now and it's effect on Noah was varying to say the least, but for some reason today was not the day I wanted to test that reaction.

As it is parties and teenagers are not exactly the best combination.
Especially when there is so much testosterone and alcohol involved.

The last time I went to an actual party, it was with Matty.

Matty- just thinking about him brings back a familiar knot in my chest.

How long has it been since he's been gone?  More than month?
Didn't he say he'd be back?

The guilt of not remembering him enough adds to the already big ball of emotions in my stomach and I promise myself to call him tomorrow...

Where can he be?
How is he?

Just as I'm scrolling through my contacts and reach his name, I hear the horn downstairs.

Chris is here.
I should go.
The call can wait till tomorrow.
There is so much to tell Matty...
Who knows how he will react.
But at least I have time to explain things to him, before he gets here.

Yeah, I have to talk to him tomorrow.

I shut my phone and look at myself one last time in the mirror.

"Shake it off Sam, it's gonna be a great party! " I say to my reflection, my voice a little shaky, before I sigh and leave.

Oh how wrong I was.

                        ***********
" You seem rather quiet" Chris says,  on the drive to Max's place.

He cleaned up nice, to say the least, in his black button down shirt, sleeves of which he had folded up to his elbows and dark blue washed out jeans.

I just look over and smile, not sure I should say anything.

The more time I spend with Chris, the more ridiculous I find the whole fake dating thing. I mean, if I'm being completely honest, I'm not sure I care about how or what Noah feels anymore .