Just a crush

Eleven

Ricky's POV

It's been a month since Emery left, and since that day in the airport I've had a lot of time to think. I like Emery, as more than a band mate and best friend. I have a crush on him, I have had one since that night in Australia. I was just to scared to admit to myself that I'm into a guy and that guy being my best friend. I'm scared of being gay, I really am, I don't want anyone to hate me.

I'm pretty sure I've always been gay because when I was with Chloe I never really liked her all that much, yeah she was pretty but all I would catch myself thinking of were boys, how I found them attractive. That's part of the reason she and I broke up, but I guess when Emery kissed me that first time it made me realize that I was gay, that terrified me.

When I kissed him this last time it was honestly the best kiss of my life, I felt so at home when I kissed Emery, like that's where my lips were meant to be. But when I pulled away I realized what I had just done and I freaked out.

But now that he's gone I feel like my world has fallen apart, he won't reply to my calls or texts, but I guess I deserve that.

As of right now I am scrolling through Instagram and seeing if he has posted anything. I go to his page and my heart stops, there's a photo with him and this girl. The caption reads " had a great day with my beautiful girl <3" he's dating someone?

Well, I guess my whole universe fell apart.

A/N: sorry for the sucky chapter, this is just a filler while I work on the next chapter, it's going to be a big one.