The Foster Kid (Part 10) (A Foster The People Fan Fiction)

Going Back

The evidence that proved my lack of sleep was my pitch black mind that’s supposed to be filled with rainbows and monsters that show up in my dreams. I’ve been lacking sleep so badly that I was even too tired to dream some shit up. It was dark and peacefully quite at the same time. And then suddenly a deafening ring shook everything. I felt like my head had just been struck by Thor’s hammer. I sat up with a quick breath, realizing that it was just the phone. Who the fuck would call at three thirty in the morning? And why did I decided to put the phone halfway across the apartment? The ringing felt like it was getting louder and louder. I think Ryan has a morning shift in a few hours, so don’t want to wake him up. Poor Gordon is going to get all his cranky crap. I had to answer it before he wakes up or the caller decided to have pity on me and give up. “Hello?”

            Tension took over as I could feel the caller hesitating. I could hear his shaky breaths and it’s starting to worry me and my goose bumps.

            “Who’s this?” I sat down and propped my elbows on the counter,

            “H-hey, kiddo.”

            I literally nearly fell off to the floor. I could feel a heart attack coming in fast. I was no longer sleepy or tired. I felt depressingly ecstatic. A weird combination. My heart started to gain speed in beating and an invisible rope was starting to suffocate me. Excitement took over, and so did the possibility of his arms emerging from the speaker and strangle me to death. I could feel tears starting to build up, even though he hasn’t utter out a single word.

            “I know that you still haven’t forgiven me, but that’s okay. I understand and you have the right to do so.”

            “Andy…” I whimpered like a horrified and confused little kid,

            “I’m sorry- I really am. That was the second time I’ve crossed the line and I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have even tried-”

            Tears leaked out calmly like how rivers would flow. I missed his voice. I missed how he freaks out when he apologizes. I miss his hugs and his nasty smirk.

            “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to say that. I didn’t mean to hurt you. Those words aren’t from me. I should’ve known when I was about to cross the line. God, it’s been a really long time since we talked. I miss you, kiddo. I really do. I’ve been gripping onto my phone for two years, building courage up, but nothing happened. I was a coward for not wanting to deal with the problem that I caused. I know that it wears you out because I told you to keep it between us, and I appreciate you in doing that for me.”

            Even though he might be on his knees right now, I was still a little scared. “Did Cubbie call you?”

            He sighed, “Yea, he did. He did call me and started yelling at me. It’s not your fault, though. It’s okay. I deserved all that. Hey, I deserved to be slit in the throat by him. Don’t be mad at him, he did the right thing. I would do that too if I were him.”

            I smiled, unable to give out a personal response.

            He started chuckling and my heart clutched, “I’m sorry that I had to call you this early, but better now than never. I know that you still don’t really want to talk to me, I get it. I just want you to listen to me whine, okay?”

            “Okay.”

            “I don’t deserve you. I don’t deserve someone who’s obedient and patient as a baby sister. I make mistakes and I tend to mislead you at some point. You’re actually right most of the time, but I honestly don’t really want to admit that you’re right. Sometimes, I just wish that I could get away from the lemons. I want- no, I mean I have to. I have to make it up to you.”