Pick and Choose

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It's been about two weeks or so. Two weeks of almost silence  from Jeff now. I don't know how he's feeling and I wish we would just tell me. I know he's sad though and I'm sad too but he's gone into this phase now where he sometimes just stares at me but doesn't say anything until I ask him "what's wrong?" Then he just shakes his head and mumbles "nothing" normally or "it doesn't matter." before getting up and exiting any room we were just in. It's starting to get irritating but I'm in understanding that Jeff is hurt so I don't stomp after him and chew him up about it, I just let him be and let him handle it. His hickeys have cleared up and now it's not so hard for me to look at him...sometimes but I suppose that's progress. I think Jeff is more affected by everything though...especially lately. I've been sleeping on the couch and Ben hasn't been to happy about that but after EJ threaten him a few times Ben has learned to hate me sleeping in the living room more quietly now. There's times were he doesn't seem to hate it that much, like when I actually play with him. Lately though I can hear Jeff yell out of fear from his room, there's been a couple times that I go to check on him to find out it was a nightmare but other nights I hear him rush down the stairs and take a deep breath before causally entering the living room like nothing happened. I've only ever asked him about it once, causing him to lose his temper and break things in a fit of tears, never telling me what was actually wrong. I didn't ask again after that. Now when he comes into the living room he walks directly over to me and flops down with his head on my lap and a tight grip around my waist. Ben never pays attention or perhaps he notices but pretends not to for the sake of Jeff. I'm glad that the others are being understanding towards him too, not making fun of him when he burst into a fit of quiet sobs and stumbles over to me like a child. They don't get extremely mad at him when he picks fights with others or breaks things out of anger. Instead they call him down and offer to go killing with him or take him to do something he'd like to do and anything he breaks that quickly fix it or throw it out before slender goes him another speech about being responsible. In the end it always has the same result where Jeff drags himself upstairs to his room. Today though...Jeff seemed exceptionally bitter, and his temper was completely out the window as he seemed to growl at anyone who looked at him longer than 5 seconds.

"Why is everyone looking at me!?" Jeff pounded his fist down against the mahogany wood dining table and everyone slowly stopped chewing their food to looked up from they're plate. I rolled my eyes subtly at the irony. No one was even looking at Jeff until now, I don't know why he was so paranoid. "Child, what seems to be the problem?" Slender asked genuinely concerned about Jeff. "I just don't understand why everyone is looking at me like I killed a man...I mean, come on I'm not the only one here." He grumbled and took a sip out of his cup. I let out a chuckle by accident at the term Jeff choose to use. Every turned to me like I was crazy for laughing at this moment in time. Jeff just looked at me almost curiously. "Jeff, you're being paranoid, no one is looking at you wrong...I promise." I half smiled at him causing everyone to whip their head back to Jeff and look for his reaction. "....O-Okay." He mumbled innocently and looked down at his plate again. The breakfast went by a little quickly after that, I think everyone was scared to trigger Jeff again.

I finished clearing up the table considering it was my turn to do so. After putting the last glass cup into the sink, I washed my hands and dried them before heading into the living room again. Jeff was sat on the couch intently watching Ben play and fight with some 13 year old online. Jeff turned to me and looked at me lazily like he hadn't slept in decades. "Hi." I chimed offering him a smile. He looked at me for a second longer and turned back to the Tv. I frowned slightly. I made my way to the couch but before passing Jeff I stuck my hand out and gently ruffled his hair in attempt to get him to smile like it normally did. Instead he just sat there with his chin in the palm of his hand and his hair all messed up like he just woke up. I chuckled a bit to myself but it quickly faded at the thought of how lifeless Jeff was being. "Let's do something today..." I said moving my body to sit next to him now. I could see him looking at me out of the corner of his eye before back at the Tv. "...like what?" He mumbled with no emotion. "Oh I don't know, let's play a game, have a killing spree, let go on an adventure!" I said excitedly and leaned into Jeff. I kept nudging him in hopes he'd snap out of it a stop being so dead. He looked at me now for a minute before back at the Tv. He finally gave off a shrug. "If that's what you want to do-" I cut him off. "I do...that is what I want to do, I want to spend the whole day with you...that is if you want to also." I said meekly now sitting still ready for him to stand up and walk out of the room. Instead he snapped his head in my direction and gave me the weakest smile but I knew he was trying. He took hold of my hand gently and pulled me to stand up. "Where you going?" Ben asked looking to us. "Out." I smiled back at him. "Who are you talking to, your boyfriend?" The 13 year olds voice was heard from the head phones around Ben's neck. It was a horrible attempt of calling Ben gay. "No you idiot, I was talking to your mom, she's just leaving my house now, she told me to tell you." Ben laughed at his own joke. I rolled my eyes at how immature Ben really was sometimes....alright most of the time. At least now I got Jeff to finally agree to leave the mansion.

I hope this goes well....

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