Homestuck Scenarios

~Birthday Gifts (Beta Kids + Alpha Kids)

John Egbert

You bought him a rubber chicken and a custom Nicolas Cage sweater. He was fucking dying when he saw the sweater.

John gave you a vase of flowers, mostly cause he was clueless on birthday gifts, and a copy of your favorite comic book signed by the author.

Rose Lalonde

You bought her a little Cthulhu plushie and a copy of the Necronomicon so you two can praise Satan because you're weird as Hell.

Rose gave you a knitted beanie that resembled Jack Skellington and an octopus backpack.

Dave Strider

You got him a pair of prescription glasses designed as shades to help him see better because his eyesight was getting a bit shody. He only wears them to read but his flattered that you cared about his well-being.

Dave mixed you a rap that explained how much he appreciates you. It was pretty cheesy but hey it made you smile so he considered it a good gift.

Jade Harley

You took her to a Zoo to look at all the various animals. She was pretty happy seeing that they were all taken care of with up most importance but ended the day letting all the animals loose and having them make you two their Queens. Shit was weird.

Jade gave you a plant that you named Frye because why not. She also gave you your own android but it ended up just falling for her android. Which was cute as all fuck.

Jake English

You presented Jake with a trip to the most dangerous place in the world. The adventure lasted nearly a month but you two came out with only a few cuts and bruises and whole lot of treasure.

Jake spent your birthday trying to show you that he could take things slow and that he could be quite the charmer however this only backfired when he accidentally fired his gun lodging a bullet into his ass cheek. You couldn't help but laugh at his stupidity.

Roxy Lalonde

You made her a breakfast in bed followed by a binge watching of her favorite show Steven Universe.

Roxy spent the whole day drinking nothing but water and soda. She said she didn't want to forget anything that happens because being sober allows her to remember anything and everything.

Dirk Strider

You did nothing but cuddle with him in bed. He wanted no presents just your company. Honestly to him the whole prospect of a gift was rather meaningless when he could just enjoy the day relaxed and comfortable.

He built you a Dirk bot that catered to your every need. It would later bite him in the ass because the bot would literally fight for your attention if you so much as gave the real Dirk a kiss on the cheek.

Jane Crocker

You took her to the beach hoping to show her the beauty of the ocean and the beauty of herself since she was so self-conscious about her appearance. Jane wore a two-piece as well as yourself and you both stayed until the sun went down and you came home only to give her a cake you so delicately baked.

Janey was a simple lady so she simply gave you a cupcake and a Mayday Parade sweatshirt.