Side Affects: A Jacob & Renesmee Story

Chapter 24: Numb

Jacob's POV

I've been standing outside for hours. My palms are bleeding because my fist are balled up, and my nails are digging into my skin. I keep seeing Leah coughing up blood and slumping to the floor dead. A million things ran through my head when Ian killed Leah. But the worst was the pain, mine and Seth's, the kid is hurting so much. He tries to down play it but he's not fooling anyone. I still wish he would've gone home with Carlisle. 

Nessie was the only one functioning enough the other night to do anything. She called Bella and told her where we were. When they got there everyone was shocked to say the least. When Nessie saw Bella she ran to her and cried. Carlisle and Edward's faces were filled with pain. Jasper was just like Alec, frozen with shock. 

After Stephanie, Jasper and I ripped Seth away from Leah Carlisle and Edward took her body away. Carlisle used his medical connections to get Leah's body back home. We all tried to get Seth to leave to but he wouldn't go. It's not hard to guess why he stayed, he's hoping to see Ian again. He's the only one though. Bella and Edward tried to convince Nessie to go home but she won't go. 

I get why though because even if we run and hide her away somewhere he'll find her. This knowledge makes my fists tighten even more and fresh blood runs between my fingers. The girl that I'm in love with is in danger and there's not a thing I can do about it. I hate this I hate feeling so... so helpless, and to make things worse Ness is blaming herself for Leah's death. Seth, Bella, Edward, and I tried to convince her that it wasn't her fault, but she won't listen to us. After she locked herself in her room I came out here. 

I just can't take all the tension in there, the fresh air helps a little but not much. Mostly because it's been two days since Ian killed Leah and promised to come back and take Ness. Everyone's been on edge since this morning. Bella's a complete wreck. I hear someone walk up next to me I could tell who it was. 

"Remember when our biggest problem was getting you to deal with me and Nessie?" I say. 

Edward laughs it's a lifeless tired sound "yes... I truly am sorry about... how I reacted Jacob" Edward says. 

"I know" I say sounding just as tired "how are we gonna get out of this one?"

He sighs, when I look at him he looks terrible. I haven't seen Edward look this helpless since I went to see Bella when she was pregnant. 

"I... I don't know" he says asI hear the window open upstairs. We both look up as Stephanie's head pokes out.

"She's gone we thought she was in her room but..." she lets the sentence trail off. Edward stiffens and I can hear Bella stressing upstairs. 

"We'll find her" I assure her, Stephanie nods and closes the window 

"Come on" I say patting Edward on the back. 

"You know where she is?" he asks following me 

"Yea I think so" I say. 

"When we first got here Ness and I found this little woodsy area. It's like a little piece of home" I say as we're running. 

"Wow" Edward says when we get there, we walk around until we get to one of the tallest trees. 

"You know today of all days is not the day to run off on us" I say leaning against the tree. I hear her sigh, she's sitting on one of the branches up in the tree. 

"I knew it'd be you two" she says I can tell she's rolling her eyes. 

"You scared your mother running off like that" Edward says, after all this time it still catches me off guard how parental his voice can get. 

"I didn't mean too" Ness sighs 

"I know" Edward says. 

"Would you consider coming down?" I ask her 

"No" she says stubbornly. 

"Either you come down or we're coming up" I say 

"I think I liked it better when you two hated each other" she mumbles. Ness gracefully jumps down but doesn't face us. 

"What happened to Leah wasn't your fault" I say to her. 

She sniffles "but it was Jake" 

"Renesmee" Edward says reaching for her. She moves away 

"Hey we're going to figure this out" I say to her, I know I'm lying but I hate to see her like this. 

"No we're not Jake, not this time...I hate this!" she blurts out "I hate that you're all in danger because of me. I hate that Leah's dead" she sniffles again. "But what I hate most is being scared all the time" she turns and faces us "I'm so scared" she says turning to us tears streaming down her face. 

Edward pulls her into a tight hug, Ness clings to him and cries. "It's alright sweetheart we won't let anything happen to you" Edward says. 

"That's what I'm afraid of" she mumbles as she pulls away from him and wipes her eyes. 

"Look Ness-" she kisses me cutting me off I don't kiss her back at first, but after a while I can't help it. I try to keep my keep my thoughts in check because of Edward, which is hard to do when she has her arms around my neck like this. After about three more minutes of this she breaks the kiss and my head is spinning. 

"Sorry I just don't know how many more chances I'm going to get to do that" she says. 

"Listen we're not letting him take you" Edward says taking her hand. 

"You might not have a choice" she says sighing 

"Well she's right about that" Ian says leaning against a tree. Edward stands in front of Ness and I stand next to him blocking her from his view. 

"Do we really have to go through this again? I've already showed you what'll happen if you two try and stop me" Ian says. 

I don't need to look around to tell that were surrounded but Edward and I hold our ground. 

"Let me make this easy for you, if you want Bella, Seth, Stephanie, and Jasper to stay alive you'll come with me right now" Ian says grinning at Ness.