A Reason To Breathe

Chapter 1

Morning rised as the cars honk their horns and people leaving a party from up stairs. Eyes opened as you stare at the cracked ceiling above you.

Sitting up from the floor, you look around to see everyone you invited to your rental apartment are either pass out or missing. Standing up you managed to drag everyone out without throwing up what you drank last night.

Locking the door you lean your head on the door as you wished you didn't have the soul of determination. Remembering the other human reseting over and over again. You just want them to reset since their DT is stronger than yours.

When will you get the bravery to talk to them? How am I going to live another day? When will it stop?

The questions that haunt you replay in your depressed mind. Like a broken record that has no hope of being fix.

Shaking your head to come back into reality, you walked into the closet since the apartment is just a room. Changing into the only other close you have.

The navy blue hoodie, skinny jeans, black vans with white laces, and a black sports bra. You forgot to clean your (f/c) shirt from the last party you did, which was yesterday.

Getting out of the closet you found your brother cleaning the place. You just went to the table in the middle of the room and grapped your ciggarets and lighter.

About to take the last one out, your brother took the cig. You look at him with a face that screams 'kill me'.

"You know Mom wants you to quit (y/n)." He touched your face so your eyes meet his,"Haven't you been taken your medicine at all?"

"Ran out a month ago."

"(Y/n)!"

"Don't yell, bro. My head still hurts, beside I have been taken over the counter stuff." Your voice was quiet and a bit raspy from all the alcohol you consumed.

"To get high right. Wait no, because you finally care." His voice just sounded disappointed like every time you see him,"Come on, you know you have to have that certain medication."

You were starting to feel uncomfortable about the topic. It wasn't like you could say anything since nothing mattered. You just miss being able to control your life. You were so happy until someone was born from some where and you had no control over anything. Started to fail school, lose friends, and especially losed the will to care about everything.

"So what, it doesn't matter."

Then your brother slammed his fist on the table making you jump.

"Stop saying that! I am tired of you saying that!" tears streamed down his face as his body started to shake.

Your heart grew heavy as you face the ground so your (h/c) hair covered your face. That was the one thing you still cared about, your brothers happiness and yet you still can't manage to do that. Keep him happy you failure.

"Eric I..." You tried to say something, anything, but what can you say when you'll just mess it up even more.

"Look (y/n), I just want to see you being happy again. To see you care again. I want to see you try for once."

You rub your arm to bring back some kind of comfort out of this. You just look at your brother with a smile.

"Anything for you, fabulous Eric." You did a fake punch to his shoulder.

He smiled as you finally called him something you made up when you both were kids. It always lifted his spirits even though he hide it by acting annoyed.

"Okay I'm going to work, and when I come back," he held the cigarette at your face,"I want to see zero of this."

"Alright Captain." You managed to solute from your dizzy hangover state.

He smiled and walked over to the front door and threw away the cig into the trash can. Without another word he just walked out and closed the door leaving you alone.

The smile on your face drained as you pull out a cigarette from you coat pocket. Holding it to your mouth, about to light it, you froze. Shaking you look at the very object you got yourself addicted to.

"If I quit, how else am I supposed to get high, be happy."

Lighting the cig that was filled with weed. You put it up against your lips and inhalant as much as you could to get a buzz out of it. Tasting the toxic fumes, you breathed out as the shaking stopped.

Scanning the room, you decided to go outside. But you had to bring acouple of things first.

Going to the other side of the room you grabbed a piece of string that was connected to the wall. Pulling down on it hard revealed a bed with a mattress with a hole carved out in the middle.

Inside the hole was a box. When you opened it you found a small note pad with a small pencil, including headbuds and an IPod.

Put the IPod and note pad with the pencil as you plug the ear buds into your ears. Listening to (f/album) as you puffed the weed and out of the apartment.

As you took one last puff of your cigarette, you took a step outside and flicked it into the street.

"Man do I hate this city." breathing all the exhausted from all the cars in the street.

Pulling your hood over your hair, you start walking to the park. You easily got lost into your music, but something caught your eye.

A skeleton looked at you with curiosity of your reaction. You just smiled a little since to many people already worry about you. Should just leave monsters out of it since they got their own problems.

He grinned back as he continued into his day. At least someone is enjoying the sun.

Finally making it to the park you sat down on your favorite spot. Where the sun doesn't touch and it's always so nice and cool. It's just relaxing to be underneath a tree as the branches sway back and forth.

As you watch people walk by on the side walk something catches your eye. Pulling out the note pad and writing utensil, you start to draw a boy that stood by himself. He just matched you in a certain way that made you feel like it would be important to draw him.

While he stood still, you noticed that he was staring at a reflection of himself. His eyes spoke that he wishes he was with his reflecting so he would no longer be all by himself.

When you finished you stared at the realistic drawing of the boy. Your mind started to change bits and pieces as your hand went to work.

The boy was crying and created a puddle. In the puddle showed him with a smile as another stood by his side. They looked identical, but little things that showed their differences.

You didn't even realize that you had a tear rolling down your face. As you drew something that was so true about you as a person.

Hugging the note pad you let the tears run down as you sat underneath a tree alone at the park.