Twitter ∞ Dan Howell

118

Direct message from @danisnotonfire

11:35 p.m. 

@danisnotonfire: hey you

@phanoclock: hola chika 

@danisnotonfire: i'm not a chika wtf that's for girls 

@phanoclock: f u anyone can be a chika

@phanoclock: don't let your gender get in the way of your chika dreams

@danisnotonfire: xD

@phanoclock: did you literally just xd me 

@danisnotonfire: i did lmao (but pronounced lah-mao ofc)

@phanoclock: as the kids say why-oh-el-oh you only live once

@danisnotonfire: jesus christ 

@phanoclock: xD

@danisnotonfire: i really enjoyed hanging out today though :)

@phanoclock: same!!! was legit the best night

@danisnotonfire: yeah :) glad you liked it!! wish i had more time here though

@phanoclock: :( me too *cri* but hey at least we're going to the zoo together tomorrow!! i can't wait to introduce you to all our wonderful fauna 

@danisnotonfire: what all the things that want to kill you

@phanoclock: essentially 

@danisnotonfire: even koalas and kangaroos can kill you

@phanoclock: pfft koalas can't kill you 

@phanoclock: drop bears can tho

@danisnotonfire: ha i'm no pommy pleb i know the ol' drop bear trick

@phanoclock: dammit

@danisnotonfire: but legit koalas can give you chlamydia 

@phanoclock: yeah but chlamydia can't kill you, just lay waste to your reproductive system 

@phanoclock: no babies for you

@danisnotonfire: lol thank god

@phanoclock: wait you don't want kids??

@danisnotonfire: no i do but like not for a while

@danisnotonfire: it still feels so far away idk

@phanoclock: yeah but your biological clock is ticking away

@danisnotonfire: don't bring on another existential crisis meg i don't need that in my life 

@danisnotonfire: also i thought it was mostly girls who had to worry about that?

@phanoclock: no men too, older fathers pass down genetic mutations to their kids

@danisnotonfire: oh shit

@phanoclock: better start poppin out dem babies howell

@danisnotonfire: hahahaha but i need a mother first

@phanoclock: oh someone to impregnate? trust me you would have plenty of volunteers, the phandom quite often reverts to talking about having your children like the true maternal gods and goddesses we are

@danisnotonfire: sounds romantic 

@phanoclock: mn

@danisnotonfire: what about you? you want to have kids?

@phanoclock: yeah one day, but that's so far away for me i think, like i'm 19

@phanoclock: plus you gotta meet the right person first you know, fall in love at all that jazzy romance shit 

@danisnotonfire: haha yeah that's true

@phanoclock: have you met the right person yet? 

@danisnotonfire: no, but hopefully soon 

@danisnotonfire: or who knows maybe i have? world is full of mysteries 

@phanoclock: damn dano we went quite deep today

@danisnotonfire: ;)

@phanoclock: omg fuck off

@danisnotonfire: lmfao lol xD roffl 

@phanoclock: literally kill yourself 

@danisnotonfire: ily

@phanoclock: *grudingly ily's back*

@danisnotonfire: haha night meg, see you tomorrow :)

@phanoclock: see you then x