Zosia POV:
I've let Ollie sober up and have a sleep so he not drunk when I explain why she kissed me and the past between us. I don't know how Ollie going to react, he might be absolutely be disgusted in me or he might understand or try to understand.
I hear a bang behind me, I see Ollie walk towards me with his hands on his head, probably from the amount of drink he had.
He sits next to me and puts his head on my knee but I jump back to move over to the other side of the sofa so that he can't be near me.He lifted his head up and look at me, weakly smiles at me.
We've been sat here for twenty minutes and both of us haven't even looked at each other nor talked to each other. Every now and again I see him going to hold my hand but hesitate and pulls away. I wanted him to hold my hand but then again I don't as well.
"I guess I should start before it's Christmas" he nods and turns me around to face him.
"It's was around the end of university and me and S-Sarah we were.... I don't know how to put this" he squeezes my hand for reassurance.
"We were in a r-re-relationship, not a long one... I think it was about 3 months. Anyway I kinda used her for exam answers, treated her like shit, cheated on her but in a way I still loved her... I can't blame anyone or anything... I didn't have my bipolar then. I do regret it, it did destroyed her. Her career. Her confidence. I hated myself afterwards" Ollie looks shocked and let's go of my hand.
"Your a.... lesbian. You don't love me anymore" Ollie whispers, I gasp and grab his hand.
"No, no I love you with all my heart... your my future, I hope I'm still yours" I cry, Ollie looks down and nods very slowly.
"Of course you are but you should of told as soon as she came in, she wouldn't of came near you" he signs putting his forehead my mine. I cry onto his shoulder not able to get my words out. He wraps his arms around me.
"Let's forget today. Completely forget it" I close my eyes and sniff my nose.
"I really really love you" I say playing with his collar on his t-shirt.
"I really really love you too"
Sorry this took so long and this chapter short, school has been a nightmare and person life had been hell❤️
