The Perfect Man | J Cole

31

Gianni

So, Jermaine got Raina pregnant, and here I am. Hugging him after he told me.

Do you wonder why?

Cause I didn't know how to react. My entire body was limbed out and so was my brain. It was frozen and I felt like I could faint any minute. Why did this happen? We just solved the whole Lorenzo thing and now here we are, Jermaine expecting another baby with another woman.

I thought he told me he never slept with anyone except for me? Did he lie?

"I haven't done anything with anyone in over 2 years. Just a kiss on the cheek, that's all I've received from a woman in these 2 years."

That's what he exactly told me.

"Didn't you say you didn't have sex with anyone, except for me?" I broke the question, still embraced in his arms. I felt him move but still try to press my body against his.

"Listen," he started and I felt him take a deep breath. "I'm sorry for lying. Raina and I said we had to put it behind our backs and forget it. So I wanted to do so. I know it was wrong for lying, but baby, I didn't want to disappoint you. Cause the way I felt when you made me believe that Lorenzo was the son of someone else, the thought of another man touching my lady and making love to her made me feel angry. I didn't want you to feel that way."

I put my hands on his chest and looked him in his eyes, before pressing a long kiss on his lips. "I just need some time. Thank you for telling me." I wiggled myself out of his warming arms and left to the bedroom, where Lorenzo was sleeping. He had a bad headache and now so do I.

I layed my head beside him and stared at Jermaine and I's sleeping son, with my thoughts all over the place.

Why Raina? Why did this have to happen?

I've never expected this. But I had no rights to be mad. Jermaine found out today and he told me today. No secrets, no lies. I was the one to leave him, so I should have expected him to sleep with other women. What man doesn't have sex for 2 years?

Of course he has looked at other women, craved other women and done things with other women. What was I thinking?

My thoughts got interrupted by the bed sinking in by Jermaine heavy weight. His arms snaked around my waist and he kissed my neck.

"I'm sorry. For lying about what I told you. I'm so sorry, babygirl." I closed my eyes and tried to relax but the thought of Jermaine becoming a father to someone else's kid was killing me.

What if he forgets about Lorenzo and I? The fact that he'll be there when his second child is born and that he won't miss the first 2 years, will probably make him more attracted to his second baby.

I took Lorenzo's tiny hand in mine.

I was definitely not going to take Jermaine away from Raina and their unborn child. Definitely not. It happened. Just like it happened with me.

He was going to take care of Raina more and spend lots of time with her, considering she's pregnant. What if he falls in love? Raina has a loving heart and she definitely got the looks.

And if they did it once, wouldn't they do it twice? What if he sleeps with her again? Or Raina tries something? Or...

"Baby, stop thinking." Jermaine's barritone whisper vibrated against my chest. "Sleep. We'll talk whenever we find the right time." He pressed a kiss on my cheek and I tried to do as he said.

I closed my eyes, pushing the thought of Jermaine with Raina in the back of my head. Everything's gonna be fine... I hope.

Jermaine

"Please give me a call." I pressed a kiss on Gianni's cheeks and she gave me a small smile, even when she wanted to cry so bad.

After waking up, I sat and had breakfast with her and Lorenzo. It was quiet and there was a thick atmosphere.

It was like she put a mask on ever since I told her about the Raina situation. I decided not to talk to her this morning since she still seemed too sensitive, me leaving her home all alone while she's sad was frightening. I was scared she would do something to herself but I promised to talk to Raina and I decided on my own to tell her about Gianni and I's relationship.

She's carrying my child now and she deserves to know, even if we ain't in a relationship I want everyone to know my eyes are only laid on Gianni and no one else.

"I will." Gianni's tired voice filled my ears and I closed my eyes, hugging her tightly.

"Don't think too much. Remember, I'll never leave you, baby. I'm all yours. Keep that in that damn overthinking mind of yours." I playfully pushed her head and she laughed.

"Tell me what happens when you come home alright."

The sound of her calling her home mine, made joy fill my soul. Home. Where Gianni and my beautiul son are waiting for me, nothing sounded better. I don't need no huge house with the newest cars, man all I need is my girl and my son to support me through this.

Lorenzo was walking around in his diaper, lost as shit. I bent down to his length and pressed a big kiss on his cheek. "Bye, son. I love you."

"Bye Jamaine." I chuckled.

"No daddy nomore?" I frowned playfully, pretending I was hurt.

He quickly put his hand on my shoulder, dropping his toy and kissing my cheek to comfort me.

"Bye daddy."