Don't Turn Around (Rogers x reader)

11.4K 421 102
                                    


A little angsty

As he sat in the back of the quinjet, relinquishing his control and allowing Sam to fly, Steve sat with an eerie stillness, with the exception of the bounce in his leg to demonstrate the withering of his last moment of patience. His muscles were rigid and his fists clenched, with closed eyes that allowed the torturous images to continue in an endless loop like a bad movie stuck on repeat. You had told him that something felt wrong before that last mission together. You told him that you thought they should retreat back, but as usual, he didn't listen. He didn't listen, and now it had been six months since he had last seen you. Because of his own damn insistence on thinking he knew best, you were missing and this was the first lead that they had caught the trail of in that whole time.

"Steve, I swear, you're shaking the whole jet. Stop it."

"Make me."

"Hey, man, don't get all bitchy on me," Sam snapped back. "We talked about this, remember? If you can't keep yourself in check, you stay here and Pete and I take the lead. It's your choice, but you had better make it now before we land. What's it gonna be?"

A quiet growl built in Steve's chest, but he held it back, knowing that it would only fuel his friend to make good on his promise. It almost caused him actual, physical pain, but he managed a weak smile and did his best to carry a calm tone in his reply. "I can behave."

"Mmm hmm. I'll believe it when I see it."

Steve silenced again, and in that entire time his eyes had remained tightly closed even as he spoke; he feared now that if he were to open them, the sight of you in his mind would be lost and he wasn't ready for that. It was bad enough that as each day passed, the memory of what you looked like began to grow hazy, but to lose it altogether would be just too much. Steve had been your protector since your first day with the team; he was your best friend, and how did he repay you? By turning away at the wrong time.

"Cap?"

"Parker?"

"Hey, I...I just wanted to say...I feel like even though this is our first lead, I think this could be it. We're gonna find her."

"Thanks."

Pete furrowed his brow at the curt reply, as if Steve hadn't taken him seriously. He really did feel good about the lead, one that he had found on his own, but now that this rescue mission was on his shoulders if it didn't pan out, the second-guessing began. He needed the Captain to give him just a hint of support, even if he didn't really believe it. "This wasn't your fault...S-steve."

Sam had been listening in from the pilot seat, feeling that the temperature around them had just dropped at the shift in Steve's posture. He had spent the last six months beating himself up, and to have a newbie tell him that he was wrong...well, it wasn't sitting well, and when Steve's eyes finally opened, they were dark and cold.

"Do you even know what happened, Parker? You weren't there. You're only here now because you were playing around with some piece of busted tech in Stark's lab and happened to catch a clue. Don't you dare sit in front of me and tell me that it's not my fault like you know a goddamn thing about it."

"Steve-"

"What?" he sneered at Sam, baring his teeth just enough to make the man straighten in his seat. "You agreed with me, Sam. Are you telling me that you were just placating me and letting me blame myself because you thought that's what I wanted? Were you lying to me when you said that you understood?"

"Of course not, but that's no reason to come down on the kid when all he's trying to do is help."

"I'm the one who turned around, Sam," Steve insisted, now standing so quickly that Pete stumbled back and away, "I'm the one who should have stayed with her, like I promised."

Imagine If You Assembled The Avengers: Volume 2Donde viven las historias. Descúbrelo ahora