Silver Lining - The Host fanfiction

Chapter 119 The Lost Cause

We were transplanted here accidentally.

- unknown 

Burns

We burry the woman next to Marcus and Patt. Holden was there to witness it. He is still trying to adjust to the new situation and having control of his own body again.

It's different than with Emma, but I suppose in comparison, Holden's been a host for much longer. He estimates it for about twenty years. He must have been one strong human to still be aware after all that time, though he says he doesn't remember much from his time with Seeker Yellow Cloud.

Will and Kelsey were quick to befriend him and he is polite towards me, though I can tell he'd rather keep his distance.

Finn is a different story. He seems quite comfortable with me. His young mind is still curious and he often asks me to tell stories about the planets I've visited, questions me what I liked better, fire or ice, or what, as a Fire Taster, I looked like.

I try to be considerate of the others when answering his questions. After all, it is a reminder to them that I don't really belong here.

But Emma likes my stories too. She has a whole array of drawings based on them. And surprisingly enough, Sophie has taken an interest as well, loving stories as much as she does and having read all her books a dozen times or more, she's an eager listener.

It doesn't quite ease my guilt about coming to this planet, nor my worries.

We don't know if the other groups are compromised. It's too risky to get in touch with them now so soon after we captured the Seekers at our doorstep. This wasn't a coincidental encounter, they were specifically looking for us and we don't know who might follow. Holden isn't much help in that regard. He says he was barely conscious at that time, only becoming more aware when the Seekers already collided with us. He doesn't think there are more Seekers on this case, but there's no way to be certain, not without risking exposure.

Though, if none of these three Seekers return home, there may be an investigation. That's why we are still alert, even now, days after the incident.

My mind wanders towards the people we have lost. Rain. Storm. Patt. Three people connected to me and Emma, connected to my other friends. Ocean. Core. Scales. And Emma says Patt had a partner too, Carmen.

How are they coping? Did Patt tell them about the deaths of Rain and Storm? Did he tell them Sky and I are missing? Have they heard about Patt's disappearance?

This is never going to end. As long as I still have connections to the outside world, we will always be in danger.

It's something that has been on my mind for some time. I have to cut ties with my old life for good if I want to keep the people here safe.

I know I could try and talk to my friends, try to make them see reason, but I have touched on the topic before with Ocean. She didn't respond well. I'm afraid things will turn out the same as they did with Rain.

No. There is only one thing I can do. It's just that I am reluctant to do it. It is such a final decision.

And there is only one story she'll believe. I have to convince her I'm going off planet. It will be difficult, but she'll have no reason to doubt my story, not after all that has happened recently.

Now all I have to do is convince Nate.

...

I find him in the game room where he is fixing one of the tables. He looks up when I enter. "Burns. What can I help you with?"

I take a deep breath. "There's something I need to discuss with you."

He lowers his tools. "You sound serious. Did something happen? Is it Emma?"

"No," I assure him, "nothing's wrong." I explain my plan to him and I'm not surprised that he's against the idea. It's a risk, but it will make our lives easier if we don't have to worry about my past catching up.

"I don't know, Burns," Nate sighs, "last time you visited friends, we ended up with Seekers on our doorstep."

"I know," I answer, "but that time we had no choice. We couldn't just let them take Finn. It was just bad luck that Patt was one of the Seekers involved. If that hadn't been the case, we wouldn't have gone to Rain and Storm's house."

"I know, son," Nate says, "we don't blame you for that, but how can you be certain the same won't happen again?"

"Because I am prepared this time," I say, "I'm not going to try and convince them to see things my way. I already know that won't happen. Making them believe I'm leaving Earth is the only way to ensure they'll stop looking for me."

Nate sighs. "And what does Emma think about this little adventure?"

I look away. "I haven't told her yet." I don't want to upset her. She blames herself enough for everything I have left behind. She'll want to come and I don't want to put her in danger again.

"You don't want her to know what you're about to do?" Nate shakes his head. "She's going to find out."

"I know," I say softly, "but I'd rather she'll find out when I'm already on my way. That way she won't try to come after me."

"I still have to send someone with you," Nate says seriously, "we don't let anyone go anywhere on their own. You need someone to back you up."

"Nate," I say, "I need to speak to my friends alone. Having some stranger with me won't help my story."

"That may be, but you're not going alone. Whoever will go with you can wait in the car while you talk to your friends. You know I trust you, Burns, but that doesn't mean there is no danger. Take someone with you or stay here."

I nod. "Alright." I know it's the only way he'll let me go.

"So, if not Emma, who will you take?"

"I don't know yet," I sigh, "I'll think about it and let you know."