Sissy Boy (ManxBoyxBoy) ⎰⛑⎰

5. fσ¢αℓιѕαтισи

(A/N: Slightly long chapter, but it just means more Blake and Ashton, right? Also, I'd like to say that I update my books, Mercy (Another  MxB BDSM book) and Sissy boy within a day or so of each other though Mercy is much farther along. If you are interested you can go check out Mercy as well, to read in between the updates on this story. It'll be the next update, so might as well just put that out there for anyone who's interested.)

~I'm a mess inside myself, I can't control my thoughts or feelings. All I need is your guidance and care, your touch, for everything to calm down so I can focus.~

A S H T O N

Blake led me up his walkway and into the house. I was sweating slightly from my nerves and was unsure of what was about to happen. Of course I knew what was going to happen. After careful discussion we'd decided the first thing he was going to do is get me used to sex. Sex, because I'd never had it before, was a big deal. 

I didn't really know if I was ready for that. I wanted him with every fiber of my being, but I was still unsure because I didn't have any experience. I knew that I wanted to have sex with him, I just didn't know if I wanted that right now. 

Of course there was also the side of me that wanted to have sex with him right now. I'm eighteen and I've never even been kissed. I want to experience the things I've missed out on, and I have had the dirtiest fantasies of probably any teenage boy out there.

But then, it also made me excited. I was nervous, but I really did want it. Does that make me bad? Should I not want it? I mean, he is twenty years my senior. He's only a couple years younger than my father, and there was something taboo about that. Despite that, I couldn't really picture losing my virginity to anybody else at this moment. I didn't really know what it was that was drawing me to the man, but whatever it is, it felt very good. 

As we were walking into the house, Blake had his hand on my lower back, making all my focus go to the sensation of his warmth radiating into my skin. I couldn't even think straight with his touch on my skin. Wrong maybe, but I didn't care. At this moment, I didn't really care. All I needed is to have him guide me as stupid as it sounded. 

His age was such a turn on to me, I don't really know to be honest why. My dad is ugly in my opinion, so it's not because I want to fuck my dad. I think it could be because he makes me feel safe, secure in some way. 

He sat down on the couch and I sat down on the couch beside him, close enough to feel the heat radiating off of him. "So, first off I want to lay out boundaries." He started, and I nodded, looking at him through my eyelashes shyly. "When you're in trouble for any reason, you don't get to sit on the couch. You must kneel in front of me. I don't like to worry about positions much, because to me they seem rather pointless." I nodded in understanding, biting my lip. "As of today, until we both agree it's time to separate, you are mine, and because you are mine, that means I am yours." He explained. 

"Does that mean I'll be the only... submissive," the word came out whispered, like I was afraid someone was going to hear it, "you'll be involved with?" I asked shyly, and he nodded his head. 

"Just as I will be the sole dominant for you. I may, if you agree to it, let you be shared, but only if that's something we are both comfortable with." He said softly, and I nodded. "I don't much like sharing myself, but sometimes it can be interesting." He looked over me, and cocked his head to the left, "What are your views on that?"