The Trials and Tribulations of Me

Chapter Ten

I groaned turning over trying to feel where I was. Everything hurt. I opened my eyes to find I was in my bed and not in Raquel's bed. I then landed on Lucas who was stroking my arm. I snatched my hand away making it known I was awake. He frowned not liking my movement. I wasn't ready to be near him right now. For almost a week and a half I had been trying to get this man to talk to me, to pay attention to me and to find out he may be cheating on me hurt me. It hurt more that I might be my fault that he went to her in the first place. If I hadn't shut him out he wouldn't have had a reason to turn to her in the first place.

"How did I get here?"

"Raquel called me and told me where you were. I had been calling your phone but you wouldn't answer."

"I didn't really feel like talking." I eased up only for my head to pound against my skull. I grabbed my head groaning. This was one reason I didn't really drink. I must've drank more than I thought because pounding seemed worse than anything I have ever had after drinking. Lucas handed me a glass of water along with some medicine. I felt him staring a hole into me as I took the medicine. With the way I felt I didn't feel like going through this right now. "Aren't you supposed to be at work?"

"I decided to stay home, there are more important things he needed to handle."

"So now I'm important?"

"You were always important to me."

"That's funny." I got out of bed and headed out of the room.

"You left me!" he yelled when I was almost out of the room. I stopped breathing hard and turning around.

"I know that and I take full responsibility for it. I came home to fix what I did to us, to make my marriage work."

"You can't just pick and choose when you want to be one with me. The choices you make have consequences Samaria."

"So that gives you the right to cheat on me? I never thought I would have to worry about you treating me this way." I could feel the lingering tears pool at my eyes and I hated that. I was so tired of freaking crying. Soon I would have nothing left to cry with. My eyes would give up and say we quit.

"For the millionth time Samaria, there is nothing going on between us." I sniffed looking down and then back at him.

"I wish I could believe you." With that I left out going to my designated bedroom where I could finally let my tears flow freely.

After our little argument I laid back in bed until my head stopped hurting. Being back in the house sober made me feel trapped. I needed to get out so I went outside on the patio. I didn't know where Lucas went, I just knew he was somewhere in the house. It was like whenever we tried to take a step forward we took two steps back. I loved Lucas but I didn't know what to do. I pulled my knees to me sighing at my messed up life.

Twenty minutes later Lucas appeared out of nowhere and sat down in front on me on my chair. He gently laid a piece of paper at my foot while looking at me. I wanted to meet him with eye contact but I couldn't. Every time I looked at him I saw her feeling on him.

"The day I asked you to marry me I told you I would always love and protect you, that even though we hadn't been together that long I knew that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you and that hasn't changed." He picked up the paper and handed it to me. I read the paper and it was our marriage certificate. A tear slipped down. I remembered when we went and got this. I was so happy that I drove Lucas crazy. I wanted to make sure we did everything right so nothing went wrong. By the time we got the certificate I felt like I had worked double time. He came closer to me wiping away my tears. He lifted my chin to make me meet his eyes. "I'm not cheating on you and would never think to cheat on you."