Backfire (Niall Horan)

Chapter 8 ~ Break down the walls

Chapter 8 ― Break down the walls

    Belle, Phebs and I were sitting in our living room that night after the boys went leaving us alone so we could talk about all this proposal of going with them on tour. It was crazy, it was exciting, it was new, it was different but at the same time it was a bit intimidating. I, personally, wanted to go but at the same time wanted to stay in my bed as far away from Niall as I could. I adored all the lads, I really did, but my feelings for the blond were becoming stronger each day and at the same time more confusing. I knew I said I was done with guys, that I wanted just to live my life to the fullest, but as the song said: you can’t always get what you want. I didn’t want to have feelings for Niall, but I couldn’t help it because the more I knew him, the more I liked him.

But what I was feeling was the least of our problems.

Phebs looked really miserable sitting on the sofa hugging her legs and burying her face between her knees. Belle was at her right; I was at her left trying to give her support in the situation. Well, I wasn’t the only one falling for a member of the so famous boy band, my dear friend here liked Liam very much, but he had a girlfriend whom he really loved, and that was killing my friend. Phoebe was a sweet girl, someone who always put the others’ feelings before hers, a shy little thing who could hardly talk about what she was feeling or what she wanted. She was the most beautiful soul I’ve ever met and it destroyed my heart seeing her like that, so sad, so desperate for what she was experimenting. She was never going to tell Liam how she felt. Never! Even if he hadn’t had a girlfriend, she wouldn’t have told him either. She had gone in dates before because the blokes asked her out, never because of her initiative –as it had been my case once, for instance.

She could be friends with Liam, though. That would have been great for her, in fact she was quite happy till the lads dropped the bomb that their girlfriends, AKA Danielle and Eleanor, were coming to the tour as well for a couple of days. That was what was killing Phebs, knowing that she would have to see Liam and Danielle together all lovey-dovey was more than what she could handle.

I hugged her tightly as Belle petted her softly on the back. The blonde sobbed softly, shaking almost imperceptibly. “It’s gonna be okay, Phebs. We don’t have to go if you don’t want to,” I said calmly.

Belle had accepted immediately when I told her about the tour with the lads, her only condition was that she was going back home once Dan came back.

“I don’t want to hold you back here, girls,” she protested in a whisper.

“It’s okay, sweetie,” my other friend said. “If you don’t go, we don’t go either. We’re a pack, we can’t be separated.” She twisted her middle and index finger to show how united we were. Phebs chuckled softly and I smiled.

“But I wanna go, too. I just don’t wanna see him with Danielle,” she mumbled and I hugged even tighter.

“I understand, but maybe that would help you get over him,” I suggested not quite convinced myself. I was telling myself the same, that seeing Niall with other girls, girls way better than me, was going to help me bury my feelings away, but I knew that it was a hopeless thought. It wasn’t that easy to forget about someone, even if your feelings weren’t that deep.

“Maybe, but it’s going to hurt so much and I don’t think I can handle that.” I didn’t believe it either. She was fragile, she was delicate, she wasn’t used to be heartbroken. She lived from fantasies she read in her books, from those male characters that loved like nobody could in real life. She had high standards for men, and that was her shield but Liam had broken down all the walls that protected Phoebe and now she was in pain because he did it not because he wanted to be with her. It was an accident.