SWEET N' SALTY | Tsukishima K. × Reader (COMPLETE)

FOURTEEN

How much can you give up for love? For the person you care about?

You gave up everything to give them all they want. All your love, time, and attention, but it wasn't enough.

You lose self-love, self-worth, and even respect. You can do the silliest things for them. For them to stay, you must convince them that you are worth staying for.

However, some people are dissatisfied with what they have and with what their partner can do and sacrifice for them. They come looking for more and can only be found in someone else.

They will eventually leave you, telling you that it was not your fault. But, in reality, they found someone else.

You've often wondered why people can't be honest with themselves about their sentiments. Why can't they tell you the real reason they've decided to leave you?

Finally, that single question will leave you hanging.

"Am I not good enough?"

You begin to blame yourself for not being enough. For being worthless and weak. You'll begin to blame yourself for everything, and you'll begin to break apart.

Isolating yourself in your room.

Crying yourself to sleep.

The next day, you woke up crying first thing in the morning.

Every good memory you recall will cause you agony. You want things to stop, you want to forget everything.

You start to feel numb.

You're already cold.

Empty.

And you begin to prefer it that way. You've lost touch with your feelings. Build barriers to shield yourself from further heartbreak.

However, there are others who are willing to put their emotions at risk in order to love again. What happened served a purpose for them. Their experiences shaped them into better versions of themselves. When the moment is perfect, they may give it their all again, knowing that this time they are enough and is worth staying for.

But for you, it's always been Tsukishima Kei. The one who both loved and hurt you. You couldn't seem to quit caring about him.

You never despised him and you never stopped loving him. It does sound silly of you, but it was the stupid truth.

You ran your finger across the silver lace ring that hangs around your neck. Playing it unconsciously while deep in contemplation.

"(F/N)—chan?"

"U—Um, sorry! What was that, Kiyoko-senpai!?" your cheeks flushed.

"Are you okay? You seemed to be spacing out lately; did something happen?" Shimizu asked, concerned.

"N—Nothing!"

"Hey! Hinata! Kageyama! What are you two doing in there?!?" Kuroo exclaimed.

You return your gaze to the man who had just spoken. You couldn't help but feel your chest tighten a little. You've avoided Kuroo for a few days now. He attempted to get in touch with you a few days ago after being involved in an accident caused by Bokuto.

You can't seem to come up with the right words to speak to him. You were, after all, rejecting him. The young man was truly waiting for it, and the wait was becoming increasingly difficult for him. He wanted to be properly rejected, but it appears you were being scared about it.

"Since when did they start talking again?" Hinata mumbled.

"Don't ask me, dumbass!" Kageyama grumbled.