The Summer Affair

Chapter Sixteen

I sat back in my seat and stared at the table.  I felt frozen, numb.  I was in absolute and complete shock.   My drink now smelled appalling and I pushed it away.  I didn’t blink, didn’t move. 

“Anna?” Jordan asked tentatively.  I didn’t answer.  “Anna, come on.  You’re starting to freak me out.”  I still didn’t respond.  “This is scaring me.  Anna Lee Collins, speechless,” Jordan muttered uneasily to himself as he yanked me up and led me towards the hallway that led to the bathrooms.  He pushed me up against the wall, and then he placed a hand under my chin, pulling my face up to him.  I felt empty.  Almost as empty as I was when Olivia died.  Here, she was lying six feet under and I was soliciting with her murderer.  She had to hate my guts right now. 

“Anna, please, I’m begging you,” Jordan shook my shoulders and tried to get me to keep eye contact with him.  “Anna, this isn’t normal.  Give me a sign, a hint, something that you are alive in there!”  That was the only thing that got through to me.  I broke down in tears. 

“I’ve been talking to him and I danced with him and he was hitting on me!” I gasped in between the sobs.  I put my face into my hands.  Jordan’s arms wrapped around me as a sigh of relief escaped his mouth.

“Thank God, Anna.  You were really scaring me,” he said as he leaned down and kissed my forehead.  He cradled me against his chest and stroked my hair.  “Your reaction just wasn’t normal.”  I continued to stain his shirt with salt water and he let me.  I knew I was going to regret what I was about to say, but I knew he needed to hear it.

“I missed you so much,” I said as I wrapped my arms around him.  My confession even shocked me.  I could tell from Jordan’s stiffening arms that he was about to pull away, and I didn’t want to add rejection to the list of things that was making me feel bad, so I pulled away first.  I looked away, at the ground, the wall, anywhere but his face.  “I need to go.”  Before I realized what was happening, Jordan had my face in between his hands.  His thumbs stroked my cheeks and I realized he was wiping tears away. 

“Anna, I missed you so much my heart hurt.  Every girl that tried to even talk to me I turned away.  It was crazy, when I knew you had already moved on.  I know I’m two years too late for that.  So this is the least I can do,” he said and leaned down and gave me a kiss on the mouth.  His mouth on mine was familiar, his taste intoxicating.  He leaned back and ran a hand through his hair, blowing out a big breath as he looked down at me.  “I need to go.”  That was all I got before he all but ran out of the hallway and outside.  I sprinted after him, wanting to talk, or at least give him my phone number so he could call me.  But as I ran out into the parking lot, I could already see him starting his motorcycle.  I crossed my arms and leaned against the brick wall and shook my head at him, saddened that he wanted to get away from me so fast.

“Fantastic,” I mumbled as the tears threatened to spill over.  He looked up at me, and without his helmet I could see every emotion playing on his face.  Sadness, longing, and pain were etched into his eyes and deep-set mouth.  I knew my features were an echo of his.  I shook my head again and looked upwards as I gave a shrug.   I walked around the corner to see that Mitch’s truck was gone.  Annoyed, I walked back around the corner only to bump into someone.  I didn’t look up, just mumbled “excuse me” and walked past.  I searched around the entire building before a hand on my shoulder stopped me.