Unsaid

Gazing

we were laying side by side on our blanket that we'd stretched out under the stars, the cool summer breeze blowing against our sun kissed cheeks. we listened to the sounds of crickets chirping in unison with the quiet car radio. the night was so still and so beautiful as we gazed up at the galaxy spread out before us. it almost seemed as if time too had decided to stand still.
it was in this moment that i knew you'd stopped loving me.
~~~
you stopped insisting that i wear your jacket when it was cold out so that i wouldn't catch a cold.
you stopped resting your hand on my thigh while we drove around in your old truck, and you didn't want me to change the radio.
you stopped telling me to text you when i got home so you could be sure that I️ arrived safely.
you stopped asking me questions about my day or how my family was doing.
you stopped answering my late night texts where i told you how happy i am to have you in my life.
you stopped finding excuses to see me, and started giving excuses for why you couldn't.
you stopped giving me gentle kisses on my forehead before we parted ways and you dropped me off at home.
you stopped acting like you cared.

and even though we still spent time together and you still kissed me the same way and you still would say "I love you", there was no denying that somewhere along the way your feelings had faded.
~~~
I knew going into tonight that this would be the end of us. and as difficult as knowing that was, i got dressed and put on a smile and thought about how this was the last night I'd be riding in your truck.

even though neither of us said anything, we both knew that we were over. we just didn't want the last things we said to one another to be "I'm sorry." so instead, we just stayed there laying next to each other without touching, listening to the crackles of the radio one last time.
once again, everything seemed to stand still.
maybe we can just keep gazing forever.