Fighting Over What's Wrong

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Faith should be home by now.

Stepping into the elevator of Faith's apartment building, I press the button for her floor.

I could really use some time with her after the day I've had. She always makes me feel good and I could use some goodness right now. Today was not a good day. All that time I wasted in class, making it seem like I was paying attention to all sorts of classes that don't really matter in the end... pretending that they matter to me when they don't mean a thing. There used to be a time when they meant a lot to me. I remember sitting around in class, absorbing every bit of information my teachers could dish out.

Somehow it feels like a lifetime ago since I was that person. All that time I spent studying and reading everything I could get my hands on and learning everything I can. For what? To have my girlfriend almost die in a fight with a demon? How does my education make that better? How does it help her heal and get back out there to do something worthwhile like fighting evil and saving the world? How is me knowing about facts and dates in history going to make a bit of difference to saving the world?

Not that I could save the world if I wanted to. I don't have anything close to a power that could help save anyone, least of all myself. So all the math, science, and art that I've been learning all these years doesn't make a difference in the big picture. It's all... just useless.

The elevator dings and the doors open up, letting me out on to Faith's floor. Immediately, I leave the elevator and start heading down the hall towards Faith's place.

That's why I need to see Faith. She always makes me feel better about everything. No matter what's happening or how useless I feel, I always feel like I make a difference when I'm with Faith. She always makes me feel like I matter because she knows me, and really cares about me. There isn't anyone else who knows me the way Faith knows me. I have to see her. She'll make everything better again. I know it.

When I get to Faith's door, I immediately knock. There's no answer. After waiting about 30 seconds, I knock again.

Where could she be? She's usually home from the dojo by now.

Again there's no answer, so I knock harder.

Did she go out somewhere and not tell me? Why wouldn't she let me know that she wasn't going to be here?

It takes me a few seconds before I decide to pull out my cell phone and call her. I hit the number 2 on my speed dial and put the receiver to my ear to listen.

She'd be number 1 on my speed dialer if the damn phone company didn't reserve that spot automatically for voice mail.

The phone rings for a while and no one picks up.

What's going on? Is she all right?

Eventually, she picks up.

"Hello?"

Oh thank god.

"Hey..."

"Oh... hey DK..."

Oh? She sounds like something's wrong.

"Hey... is everything all right?"

"Yeah, why wouldn't it be? Where are you?"

Slowly, I start idly pacing in the hallway.

"I'm over at your place looking for you, where are you?"

There's a short pause before she responds.

"I'm at the dojo Dawn, researching the demon? Remember? We talked about you coming by after school to help this morning?"

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