Just Remember Me (sfs)

Chapter 15

                                                                                      [Aida POV]

It's been a week well at least it felt that way. I miss her voice. I miss her laugh. I miss when she got mad at me. I miss her hugs. I just miss Ezra man. I'm just what words did Rena say? One missing ass bitch. Excuse my French. Rena also told me that Ezra doesn't fit into my world and if that I really miss her I should get off my high and mighty for just a second. I have no clue what she's talking about. But I literally never know what that girl is talking about , but Ezra says she's always right. There I go mentioning Ezra. I had a strong urge to call her, but my guilt wouldn't let me. Every time I'd be about to send a quick text it became a paragraph about my feelings and how I'm stupid but I never sent them. There aren't words I can say through to text , to get her to understand How truly sorry I am. I feel like a bipolar person. It's like I know how deeply I feel about her, but I won't allow myself to. I don't want to play with her emotions, god forbid I do that. But aren't I already doing that by confusing her with complex mood swings saying 'I want you' , 'Oh no I think we should just be friends' cycle. I think I should just let her go. But my heart won't allow me to do so. I told my mom this and her exact words were "Boohoo cry me a river damn it. If you don't go grab her and go before somebody snatch that blessing you little shit." No love at all man. I'll call her. Yeah I'll do it this time.

I picked up my phone and my hands instantly got moist and my heart rate began to pick up. Chill Aida you got this. It rang a few times then "Hello " her voice boomed softly through the speaker. "Can we talk?Like face to face?"I stammered on my words. The line was silent for a while then I heard a doorbell "Hold up let me answer the door right fast" I said with the phone still to my ear as I looked through the peep hole and seeing Ezra. I opened the door slowly.

"I was about to leave then you called me.I have to talk to you to "She looked me in my eyes as she hung up the phone. I sighed but I pulled her into a hug "Don't go .Stay here please..I need you"

                                                                             [Flashback]

"But Mommy!!!!I don't want Ezzie to go" I cried holding Ezra tightly. I was only six at the time. My mom looked at me then at my Father.

"Pleaseee me wants to stay"Ezra pleaded on the verge of tears. I hated to see my best friend cry. I cupped her face and squished her cheeks together "Don't cry baby bear". She started to laugh

My Dad looked at Ezra "Ezra darling if you want to stay say stay say yes". I looked into her eyes and hugged her tightly "Please don't go. Stay. Me need you cheetah girl". 

She pulled away "I gotcha always. Cheetah Swear"She held out her pinky and I took it dragging her back upstairs to my room"

                                                               [End of Flash Back] 

"How'd you find out?" She frowned not yet crossing the threshold into my house."Let's not get into that. Is it true?" I pulled her into my house shutting my door. I don't call this house a home a for a reason.

Her head hung low"y..yes"She tripped up on her word. It was audible enough for me to hear. My heart fell to my feet. It felt like I just got got hit by a ton of bricks. My chest started to ache. If this is what pain felt like then that's what I'm feeling. I shouldn't feel that way knowing I'm the reason she's leaving. That reason made it hurt worst.

I felt a hot tear roll down my face as I looked at her. Her head was still down, so she didn't see thank god.She looked back up with tears in her eyes, my heart ached a little more at the sight

"Stay. Ezra please. I -I need you who else is going to make fun of my horrible cooking skills? Who am I gonna love when you leave? Because only person I truly love is standing before me?. I know I hurt you. I know I'm complicated but I mean it. I want you. Baby I want you. I want you to stay. Say yes and you have me. I was unhappy before you came back into life. I was lost for so long Ezra please just stay"I was on both my knees clinging to her at this point. I can't believe I said I loved her. I meant it. It felt natural an unforced . She stayed silent for a long time.

"Aida I have to go. I can't keep doing this with you. I love you so much it hurts to go.But if I stay I'll break my own for somebody who didn't give me the time of day over and over" She pulled me off my knees. I felt numb all of a sudden. I know I fucked up "Please" was all I could say

"I-I'll think about it. Even if I were to stay I wouldn't fit in.Rich girl with supposed Hood Rat as your people would like to say. A Rich Hood-Rat at that. Your friends thought I sold drugs because they said it wasn't No way I could of got it on my own.You're out of my league even with our history together I never fit into your crowd."She croaked out sighing. It dawned on me what Rena was saying. It added up. I felt bad, really bad now. Is possible to feel even worst than you did before?

"I don't fit in with your crowd but I make it work for you. I let loose for you. Just because I was and am privileged doesn't mean I care any less. I love you damn it"I started to raise my voice just a little. You could hear the defeat in my voice as I sunk back onto my knees.

"I love you too Aida but I have to-"

"Go then Ezra." I spoke softly,I had no hint of anger in my voice, nothing rude or disrespectful was hidden in my voice. Just pure defeat and sadness evident in it. If I love her I'l let her be happy. Happy to her is being far away from me. I'll just have to deal with it. It felt as if my entire world turned into raging hell fire before my eyes. It turned into complete and utter shit. I couldn't do anything to change her mind.I'm numb, if I thought I knew What loneliness and emptiness felt like before it I really feel it now but in waves.

She slowly headed towards the door "See you around" I weakly nodded "Lock the door please" I said just above a whisper before  I broke down into tiny pieces in front of the door. I did this. I'll live with it. 

I looked out the window to see Ezra hasn't left yet. She was banging her steering wheel crying and falling apart before my eyes. I rushed out to her and opened her door 

"Stay a n-N-Night." I sniffled picking her up. She didn't protest she just snuggled into my chest and sobbed more  as I brought her back into the house

--

So at least Aida knows she fucked up.

Was Aida right to feel the way she did?

Ezra's reaction?

Will Ezra stay or go?

Comment/Vote