Ghost of a Hero

Stranger danger!

The front door was ajar. The wind stirred the trees. Something was off.

If I had hairs on the back of my neck, I'm sure they would've prickled.

No, toss that, they probably would have singed.

Nah, scratch that, they would have burrowed back into my skin in terror.

Needless to say, I was glad I didn't have a body right now. Physical bodies equaled physical torment, and I couldn't feel pain at the moment.

"Ok, this is the part of the movie where the idiot calls out, looking for someone. They alert the intruder that they're home. They get killed. I'm not that stupid." I whispered to myself in an attempt to steady the laugh bubbling in my throat. I floated around the side of the house, staying close to the walls.

If something unnerved a ghost, something was wrong.

The house was too quiet. It seemed no one was home.

I entered the house through the wall. The floorboards overhead creaked. Someone was shuffling around my room.

They would expect any company to come through the door. They'd be keeping a close eye on the window too. They wouldn't expect company through a random second-floor wall, though!

I gingerly floated up to the second floor, looking in through my bedroom wall. Someone in a red suit was in my room, digging through the items on my desk. Their back was facing me. He looked so familiar. That ass also looked familiar. Didn't Cooper have a butt shaped like that?

This is the part of the movie where the idiot calls out, alerts the bad guy, and a big fight breaks out between the burglar and the girl. Somehow, she ends up hitting him over the head with a chair.

I was a ghost, for god's sake! I would haunt him until he left! A+! Perfect plan!

Floating inside my room, I came up behind him. He was rapidly looking for something, moving pens and paper out of the way. He allowed documents to float to the floor, frustrating me to no end.

This was an invasion of privacy. I needed this to stop.

"So, you come here often?" I asked. The man jumped. He literally jumped. I've never seen someone jump so high. He could probably set a world record with that.

"Holy fucking- jeez Ahsper! Scare the shit out of me, why don't you?" He said.

Wait a minute.

A striking red spandex suit... check

A bright red mask that covers his identity... check

Muscles that my dads swoon over... check

Yep, there was no doubt. Red Chrysan was standing in my room, going through my things. Why would a hero make a mess of my desk?

Good question. I'd ask later.

"You better not have gone through my underwear drawer!" I threatened. It was an empty threat, but a threat all the same.

I needed to get my priorities together. Red Chrysan was in my room, in all his spandex glory.

"Wait- scratch that question. Are you here to have sex with my dads? Their room is down the hall. I can take you there if you want." I punched the bridge of my nose.

Red Chrysan frowned. He scratched the back of his neck where his black hair met his neck. "Um, no thanks, Ahsper. I'm not interested in a relationship with a married couple."

"How did you know my name?" I asked. Right, his sexuality was none of my business.

Red Chrysan stood there dumbly. "Your name is literally on every news channel. How could I not know it?" He asked. He looked me over. He was probably confused under that mask.