Back To The Start (One Tree Hill)

Chapter 3

Julian's POV

I watched Brooke leaving the house as I suddenly noticed my mother behind me. Even before I turned to her, I knew she had been drinking again. I could smell it.

"What do you think, to bring... this... this slut to our house!"

I tried to stay calm because I knew there was no point arguing with her when she was drunk. "Brooke is not a slut," I said, turning away to leave.

"Julian Andrew Norris, you... you're not turning away from me... when I want to talk to you...!"

Her eyes were glazed, and she already had problems with the articulation. "Please Mom, let me go!" I had no desire to argue with her, and certainly not about Brooke.

"She is bad... bad, Julian! And I don't allow you to see her again!"

"I'm 18, Mom, and not a baby anymore!" I protested. "I know what I'm doing." I barely had finished the sentence when I realized that I just made a big mistake, because her already pale face grew even paler.

"What did she do to you?"

"What?" I thought I had misheard. What did she mean by that?

"I knew I should have forbidden her... to... to go alone to your room."

When I slowly realized what she meant, I could only stare at her in shock. She actually believed that Brooke and I had made out in my room instead of studying! "I've given her math coaching," I explained patiently, although I was seriously wondering why I was justifying myself to her. "No more and no less."

"I heard... music... from your room."

She had her arms on her hips and looked at me reproachfully. And I made the next big mistake when I remembered Brooke dancing around my room with her eyes closed; I smiled.

"That's it. You'll never see this... this girl... again!"

I woke up from my thoughts and shook my head slowly. "We go to the same school. That will be hard to avoid." When she suddenly turned away from me and walked towards the living room, I followed her slowly.

"I'm calling... calling your father. For a change, he... he should take care of you."

As she reached for the phone, I grabbed her wrist. "Don't do that, Mom! Should he find out that you have been drinking again?" To my biggest surprise she suddenly began to laugh hysterically.

"As if your... father would care... what I do. He's only interested in himself... himself and his... his bitches he shares... his bed with."

I closed my eyes in frustration and had to agree with her silently. My father, a famous movie producer, lived thousands of miles away from us in Los Angeles and came only home to fleeting visits. I was not naive. I knew from young age on that he wasn't faithful to my mother during his absence. And he made no secret of his affairs. I remembered the day I first found her drunk when I came home from school. I was just thirteen at the time and totally shocked because I had never seen her in such a state before. But it hadn't been a one-time slip, as I had realized soon afterwards, because she drank regularly from then on and occasionally took pills she supposedly needed for her nerves or for her insomnia. And I just felt helpless and totally overwhelmed because I had no idea how to help her. There was no one to whom I could have confided. So I kept it a secret and tried to cover up what happened almost daily in our house. My mom hadn't been very sociable before, but she hadn't left the house in five years. It was too embarrassing for her that someone could find out that she was drinking. My dad knew about her condition, but either he didn't care or he tried to block it out. In any case, he did nothing to help her. So only I remained. And suddenly I understood why my mom had been so hostile towards Brooke. She was afraid. Afraid to lose me to a girl. Because if she lost me, she would have nothing left in her life to live for. Gently, I took the receiver from her hand and put my arm around her. "Take a rest, Mom. You will feel better after that." When she nodded, I brought her to her room, helping her into bed. I already had the door handle in my hand when she called me back.