Mr. Mendes S.M.

4

2 hours later

Elizabeth's POV

I squeal as Shawn nuzzles into my neck, kissing all over while we watch Netflix, dinner gone. "Shh!" He laughs, kissing lighter before pulling away. "No!" I laugh, watching the snow falling outside start to fall harder. "Welcome to Canada." I laugh, sitting up and climbing on the back of the couch, watching the snow. "Get down! You are not a cat!" Shawn scolds, a smile poking the corners of his lips. "Yes I am!" I say, jumping down and running on all fours into the kitchen and climbing on the table before the counter, meeting his eyes as I slap a cup off of it. "Stop!" He groans as I start meowing, hitting more stuff off the counter like his keys and his wallet, pushing his phone gently to the edge, screaming as he gets up and tugs me down, pushing his phone in his back pocket and carrying me up to his bedroom, sitting me in the chair while he flops down in bed. "If you're going to be a cat you're not sleeping in my bed." He says, and I gasp. "No!" I whine, bouncing down and climbing on his chest. "Yes!" He says, rolling me off and cuddling in my side. "I don't want sex yet. I want to wait a little bit longer. I just want to be 100 percent on the fact that I'm ready." I say quietly, and he nods. "That is totally okay." He says, resting his head on my chest and closing his eyes. "Two weeks till Christmas, I was wondering if you wanted to spend your break with me." He asks, and I nod. "I would love to. But I don't want anything." I say quickly. "Nice try." He says, shaking his head. "No, Shawn. I don't want anything." I say. "Too bad. You're my girlfriend, and I am going to spoil the shit out of you." He says, sitting up. "I don't want to be spoiled." I say, and he shakes his head. It's already done. Can't return now." He says, and I groan loudly. "Shawn, please don't. Keep it wherever it's hidden." I say, and he sighs. "No. You deserve it!" He says, and I groan and climb onto his back, wrapping my arms and legs around him. "What, babe?" He asks, pulling me around and holding my waist. "I'm tired. Let's go to bed." I say, and he nods, standing up and carrying me into the closet, getting the two blankets I love to sleep with along with the shirt I sleep in. "You are honestly amazing, that you remember all this shit." I say, kissing him gently. "I know." He laughs, setting me down in the chair with my legs over the arm. "Cocky much?" I ask. "Yes. But this is a special night. This is the first night I sleep with you, not on the couch when you take the bed-I mean, if you're okay with that?" He says, suddenly shy and blushy. "I am." I say softly, kicking my legs gently before sitting up and grabbing the shirt while he sets up the bed, going into the bathroom and changing into it, going out and smiling when I see him waiting for me. "Come here." He says, smiling when I run into his arms and hug him tight, letting him pick me up and carry me to the other side with the blankets before putting me down and covering me up, turning out the light on my side and climbing over me to get to his side and settling in, looking at me with a smile on his face. "What's up?" I ask quietly as he gets up and sighs, going into the bathroom and closes the door as I close my eyes and just breathe, snapping awake when I hear his tears and cries, getting up and going to the door, pounding hard on it. "Shawn, open the door!" I scream, hitting harder and slamming my body against it, the cracks around the knob starting to show. "Please!" I cry, finally having enough and laying on my back in front of it, squaring my body with my feet on it, kicking hard, and the thump from the door hitting the wall snaps me up to a sitting position. "Shawn!" I say, shock filling me as I find him with blood rolling down his wrists, about to make another cut. "No!" I yell, hitting the razor out of his hand and getting towels, tightening them around his wrists, and that snaps him out of his daze that he's in, terror filling his eyes. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry Elizabeth." He says, moving my hand off and holding them himself as I get up and go get two small bags of ice, returning and placing them on his wrists. "You can't do this. You can't." I say, digging in the cabinets and pulling out a roll of gauze. "Why?" He asks gently, and I bite my lip before showing him my own wrists and lifting the shirt and showing my belly, the red lines showing him what I've been doing for the past 4 years of my life. "You'll be a trigger. I can't be around triggers." I say softly, wrapping his arms gently and kissing his cheek when I'm done, helping him up and getting him in bed. "I don't think tonight is the best night for us to sleep together." I say, his eyes widening as I sit by him. "Why?" He asks. "Because it's not. I'm sorry. I'm going home." I say, getting up and pulling on my jeans and grabbing my bag and my phone, kissing his head and leaving, the snow falling hard around me.

The next morning

Shawn's POV

I wake up alone, but it isn't a surprise. I didn't expect Lizzie to come back to me last night since I scared the shit out of her. I didn't really think I would have a breakdown like that, but I still did and it makes me really upset that I let her see that side of me. "God damnit, Mendes, you fucked it up again!" I yell, getting in the shower after pulling off the gauze, washing quickly and going out, getting dressed for work.

2 hours later

I go in my room two hours early, smiling when I see Lizzie there. "What's wrong?" I ask, kissing her head. "I wanted to be here with you." She says, standing up and leaning in my chest as I set my bag down and hug her tight. "You're a sweetheart." I mumble, feeling her tears start just a few seconds before my boss comes in. Shit.