Love isn't judged by Appearance

chapter 26

Zavians P.O.V.

I didn't want this for her. Not even for me,but I'd rather have it than her have it. She doesn't deserve this. I saw her whole soul just being crushed when she found out. Words can't explain how guilty I feel. I tried to comfort her,but she pushed me away. She said that she'd never forgive me. That truly pained me. I still love her,but it's clear now that she doesn't love me.

"Baby I'm sorry." I say. She clears her throat.

"I'm not your baby...Zavian..." She chokes on her words but continues.

"I did everything for you. I opened My heart for you...it was all for you and nobody else! Then you come and throw shit in My face and I can't help but wonder why you would do this to me...what did I do to deserve this...definitely from someone that I loved. I take that back I still love you,but don't think that I'm coming back to you! Fuck that correction shit!! Fuck it! I got AIDS because of you! I don't want you ever apart of My life anymore! I mean it when I keep saying that I'll never forgive you...you've vesical ruined My life... If you were gonna cheat then you should've told me so we could've ended us a long time ago...I hate you" Tears are springing out of her eyes.

"I'm sorry. It was never supposed to turn out this way." My own words make me mad because I know the truth behind them. The truth that I can't tell her. I've seen her hurt too much already.

"It's to late to apologize Zavian! I got AIDS! You can't cure that shit!! Pleaseif you can't take it away don't tell me that you're sorry." She's not mad,but hurt. Those are words coming from someone that's hurting. I don't know what to say everything that she wantsme to say would just hurt her. She needs to know though. I pull over on the side of the road.

"You wanna know why? Huh? Wanna know why all of this happened?" I ask her. I'm ready to tell her the truth. I just pray that she understands that I've changed. She nods her head. I take in a deep breath and begin My story.

"Tammy Hill and I were dating before you and I even started talking"Talking" it was just a secret because we didn't want people to start mess and drama. Nobody knew. Not My closest friends or hers. Well she pissed me off. So we broke up. I was thinkingof ways to piss her off or to make her want me back. I really didn't love her. I was just going off of what My mind was saying not My heart. So I told Kevin I wanted to talk to you. And you know the story from there on. I wasn't supported to fall in love with you or do any of the stuff that went down between us. You were at first just apart of My plan to makeTammy jealous. I Fucked her a couple a times when we first started going out. I told myself I was going to break up with you,but I couldn't I found myself falling in love with you. I started to actually feel love. A love that made My heart have a perfect beat. So I told Tammy we needed to stop. She was fine with it. Said that when I needed her for what I wanted that she was just a call away. We were going fine. Until the miscarriage...that's when everything went downhill. I left the hospital and called her. She gave me what I wanted at the time but didn't need..." I look over at her. She brings her hand to My face. Slapping me hard.

"You're such a fantastic actor...you had me the whole time. Movies over now. I can't believe you." She rolls her eyes. Tears staining her face.

"I fell in love with you...I changed. It all changed for you."

"It doesn't matter though...I have AIDS now and so do you. I could've played the role along with you. Instead of you lying to me. "

She doesn't understand just as I knew she wouldn't,but now she knows the truth. She needed it the whole time.

Sooooooo yeah there you go! I wanna dedicate this to Ariesgirl72! You really wanted to know why so there you go :) this chapter doesn't need a smiley face,but that sentence did. So I'm gonna post tomorrow most likely!