Determinant: One choice will change everything

Chapter 15: Tris - New Perspective

Chapter 15: Tris – New Perspective

When I wake up, I'm cocooned between Tobias' body and arm. He feels warm and good, and it would be easy to stay here all day. I prop myself up just enough to see his face, watching him sleep. He looks deeply relaxed – younger and far less stern than he seems when he's awake. I don't know if it's his strength or the weight of his worries that makes him look older during the day.

His breathing is even, his muscles expanding and contracting where I'm pressed against his chest. I wasn't sure he'd be able to fall asleep in this place, with his claustrophobia, but he finally relaxed after, well, that. The thought makes me smile, though part of me still feels nervous being this close to him, like we're breaking some kind of rule and will get in trouble for it. I guess it's my Abnegation instincts, but it's kind of funny that after all the real trouble I've been in lately, this should still worry me.

He moves a little, beginning to wake up, and I freeze, trying to encourage him to sleep longer. I know we have plenty to do today, but he'll face it better if he's well-rested. He must have slept himself out, though, because he shifts again and opens his eyes. For a second, they dart around uncertainly, and then they settle on me, and he smiles. His eyes are deep blue, almost black in the low light, and I think of the first time I looked into them. I smile too.

"Good morning," he murmurs, his voice low. He tightens his arm around me as he leans over and brushes his lips along mine.

"Same to you," I mutter. I'm beginning to really wake up now, and I yawn as I stretch the entire length of my body, short as it is. When I open my eyes again, Tobias is staring at me, watching my stretched body with a look I might not have liked a few weeks ago. But now…it's nice to know I affect him that way, though perhaps not first thing in the morning.

I clear my throat hastily and ask, "So, what do you suppose we need to do today?"

He grins. "I'm pretty sure whatever it is can wait." He leans over me again, but I laugh and push him back onto his side of the bed. It's much too early for that.

"Aren't we supposed to be preparing for our big, dangerous mission?" I say. "The latest one, that is."

He looks at me longingly for another moment and then sighs. "Yeah, there's that." He props the pillows against the wall and sits up, and I do too, though I pull the sheet with me. It feels too revealing to sit without it.

"I guess the biggest question is, do you think they're telling us the truth?" I ask.

He purses his lips thoughtfully. "They definitely believe what they're saying, and it's consistent with the video, and with what Cara suspected, and with how Jeanine manipulated the city…. So, yeah, it seems likely." He gives a half smile and adds, "But I've been wrong before, so to me the real question is, what do you think?"

I pull my knees up to my chest, wrapping my arms around them. "My instincts say to trust them, and I usually go with my instincts. But what I keep wondering is…how much do they actually know? I mean, they both lived in the city most of their lives, and they haven't been here all that long. Someone else must have been running this place before that, and maybe still is – and we don't know anything about whoever that is."

Tobias nods. "There are also the other rebel groups they mentioned. We know nothing about them, except that they currently have a common goal. If we can pull this off, there's no way of knowing what they'll do afterwards."

I bite my lip as I think about that. It's a huge unknown. Finally, I ask, "So, what do we do?"

"I think…" he responds slowly, "that we're not going to know everything in advance, no matter how many questions we ask. We're going to have to figure things out as we go, and that means we need to be smarter this time than we have been." I look at him questioningly, and he sits forward, picking his words carefully as he continues.