Head Over Feet

Obstacles

RJ couldn't take his mind off Dei and what happened to them this morning.

He was driving to his father's house in Laguna with a wide grin on his face.

As he arrives home, he plops in his bed and texts her.

"Hi Dei."

"Hey RJ... What's up?"

"Just checking up on you. It's a Saturday night, do you have any plans?"

"Wala naman, I'm here at my mom's house, may mga kailangan lang asikasuhin."

"Oh. Ako din kakauwi lang ng Laguna, nagpalipas ng traffic."

"About this morning pala..."

"Yeah?"

"I don't usually have a thing with my students... Bawal yun.... Maybe it's best if we forget about what happened."

"How can I forget Dei.... It's the 2nd time that I've tasted your lips and I really can't wait for more."

"....In my defense, the first one happened when I didn't know you were my student."

"And the 2nd one...?"

"Well, circumstantial."

"Best circumstance in my life by far."

"Is it okay if we go back to just being strangers?"

RJ stared at her message and it felt like someone splashed a bucket of water over him.  He needs to talk to her right now.

"May I call you?"     He replies.

Just as Dei was about to tell him not to, her phone rings.

"Hello?"

"Dei...."

"Yes RJ?"

"Baka pwedeng pag-usapan naman natin ito..."

"Ano bang gusto mo?"

"I want you..."

"RJ, you're just a child. I am actually the one at fault here. I'm sorry for leading you on, pero hindi talaga pwede."

"Why? I know of professors who are in relatioships with their students. Bakit tayo bawal?"

"Well for one, you're my student."

"For just in less than 3 months. After that, di mo na ako studyante."

"Well yeah."

"....Pwede naman kitang ligawan ng tatlong buwan. Or more. Hindi naman ako nagmamadali e... Just... Just don't leave me."  

RJ tries to control himself. He didn't want to sound desperate, but he couldn't help it. He needs more of her.

"I can't go back to being strangers Dei."

"....RJ, hindi talaga... Hindi pwede. Hindi pa pwede...."

"What do you mean hindi pa pwede?"

"Basta. You wouldn't understand."

"What wouldn't I understand? Are you in a relationship?"

".... I am actually trying to get out of it." 

Dei hesitates to continue. He's too young, she thought. He shouldn't be involved with this kind of drama. And she has a lot on her plate. Her promotion, her PhD, her annulment.

"It's a long story Jay, something I do not openly discuss with others. But in the meantime, I don't want to drag you down to my murky life. I'm trying to protect you. Please?"

"I don't need your protection... But... okay..." RJ sighed. "But know that I won't stop showing you how I feel, even from afar."

"Thank you. I'll see you in class Mr. Faulkerson."

Dei hangs up the phone.

She feels a certain sadness as she holds her phone on her chest.

He'll get over it, I'm sure.  She thought.

Eh ako? Will I get over him?