Divergence: Choices

Chapter 1

I groan as I slowly wake from the sound of my alarm. Based on the pounding in my head and the fact I am sleeping in yesterday's clothes tells me I drank too much last night. I hesitantly sit up letting my feet touch the ground trying to compose myself before standing. I run my hand down my face to wipe away the sleep that plagues me before stumbling to the bathroom.

I manage to drag myself into the shower, hoping the cold water will wake me. For a moment I let my weight lean against the cool tile, trying to figure out how I am going to face this day, how I am going to face her.

When I arrive to the simulation room, Lauren is already speaking to the Dauntless born while the transfers are nervously waiting on me. I look around the room at the initiates, really only caring about one.

"Tris!" I yell stumbling over to her. "You look different." All I can see her her piercing eyes staring up at me in apprehension with a shy smile on her face. I cringe at the scattered memories of last night.

Fucking jackass. I shake my head at myself.

I finally bring myself to look in her direction, to meet her eyes. Her facial expression is neutral, of course it would be, the Abnegation in her makes her humble. Christina's however is not. She is trying to hide her smirk, wonderful. I shake my head and walk into the simulation room to start setting up.

"You look like you had a rough night, Four." Lauren grins at me.

"You could say that." I snap at her. I don't mean to be so harsh, I consider Lauren a friend really, but I am too pissed at myself to be kind today.

Peter is the first initiate I call back. Out of all the initiates, he has the most fears as well as the most disturbing ones. I have caught myself wondering where they come from, if their origin is what causes his sadistic nature. I try to pay attention, but my mind is invaded by pieces and glimpse of my drunken memories.

She notices my smile, returning it. "I would ask you to join us."  I continue to stare at her, my eyes wandering down to her collar bone, drinking in the flesh she shows.

I groan, slumping my head into my hands. Way to go Four.

I lead Peter out, I am about to call the next initiate back but I can't help but notice Uriah smiling at Tris, and even worse, she is smiling back, blushing. I look at Al to call him back and instantly see the lust and jealously on his face as he watches Tris with Uriah.

Great. There are three of us, and from the looks of it, Uriah is her choice. The thought causes my stomach churn.

"Let's go Al." I snap, grabbing everyone's attention, including hers. I want to smile at her, to talk to her, to touch her. Instead, I give her a cold look and follow Al through the door.

I sit impatiently waiting to break for lunch, I restlessly tap my thumb on the table as if it will pass the seconds faster. My every thought is invaded by Tris and what I could have possibly said or done to her last night.

I lean in, staring feverishly at her lips, wondering how they must feel-taste.

Shit, did I kiss her? God, please tell me I didn't kiss her. What if I did? My knee bounces with a sense of urgency as if it will speed up Al's simulation.

"Are you that desperate to get out of here?" I snap out of my daze to find Lauren staring at me.

"Sort of, I need to go to the control room for something." I mumble to her hoping she doesn't ask anymore questions.

"Go, I can handle this." She gives me a small smile before focusing her attention back on Al.

I tell her thank you and dart towards the control room, knowing exactly who I will find there.