Alice in Wonderland

Chapter 26

Chapter 26

I run my fingers through my newly trimmed hair, grinning at myself in the mirror. I can see my mother's angry face and I know she would have punished me for ever touching the length of my hair. She believed a woman should wear her hair long and natural, but in the end it was just another way to control me.

I had only requested a few inches be cut off because I do like my hair the way it is. I had thought about dying it completely blonde, but trimming it is enough for me right now. Perhaps I can go bolder in the future.

Mrs. Sharpe smiles at the sight of my hair when I approach her, even though it doesn't look much different. I'm worried I should have told Kyle I was cutting my hair, but it's so little he probably won't even notice.

"Do you like it?" she asks and pulls out her wallet to pay the bill. I nod my head and run my fingers through it again, feeling nauseous by the missing hair. I assure myself it will grow back soon.

We exit the salon and we turn in the direction of the restaurant next store. Mrs. Sharpe had wanted to spend some time with me today, but I secretly think it's just so she can interrogate me on my progress. She seems content so far that I'm where I should be.

We get seated in a booth and I open my menu immediately since I've never been here before. Mrs. Sharpe is on her phone, probably trying to control one of the boys through texts. She never gets a break from them.

"So, I know I haven't been completely honest with you in the past and I apologize for that. I have to do what I believe is best for you," Mrs. Sharpe starts after she sets down her phone. It pings right away. "And I think it's best that you know what's going on with your parents."

This conversation worries me and I want the waitress to hurry so I can calm myself down with some water. I set down my menu, suddenly not caring what I get. "What's going on?"

"Well, their trial is set for next week and I want you to be aware that it is happening. I know a lot of your classmates know about the trail, so I don't want you to feel like the last to know again."

I listen intently, trying to process everything she's saying. My parents are already out of my life, but the idea of them permanently behind bars makes me feel anxious. My brain is trained to think of them as the good guys, but logically I know they aren't. As much as I want them to pay for what they did to me, a small part of me feels guilty that they'll spend the rest of their lives in prison. I still don't know what their intentions were or why they kidnapped me in the first place.

"I don't want you to worry, though. You don't have to be there and I know they aren't going to be getting off. They were denied bail."

She continues to assure me, but I cut her off. "I want to go."

Mrs. Sharpe is so shocked I think she's going to fall out of the booth. Her mouth is open in surprise and she quickly shuts it after a moment of silence. "Lily, I understand you want to be aware of what's going on, but I don't think you're ready to see them."

The thought of seeing my parents again turns my stomach, but I don't show it. I'll never heal unless I can look my parents in the eyes and tell them they no longer control me. Every single one of my thoughts is still controlled by the brainwashing they forced me to endure. I am no longer hiding from my problems like they always wanted. I need to face them and that means facing my parents.

"I can handle it," I assure her, thankful when our waitress comes over to take our orders. We both order salads and are left in uncomfortable silence when our waitress leaves.