Part 26 - Untiltled

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"I don't understand..?"

He stepped closer and you just took a step further away. Of course you wanted to turn right around and hug him, tell him it was a joke and it would all be ok,

but it wouldn't. 

Y/n: "I don't want this..anymore"

Coups: "You are joking right?" he leant a hand and you pushed it away aggressively. Every move was done with such regret and fakes, you didn't realise it was possible to lie so much to yourself.

Y/n: "Get it in your head! I don't want you anymore, you're so aggravating. Everyones right, we don't suit each other and never will" you bit your shaking lip as tears streamed and breathing became harder.

Coups: "What..? Where has all this even come? This isn't you Y/n..i thought you liked me"

Y/n: "Get over yourself! I could never like someone like you, you were just a fun pass time, that's all you ever were and ever will be"

Coups: "Y/n..whats come over you..?" he was so quiet he was just about whispering. Like a mouse he reached out so gently, reaching for your love but you wouldn't give anything.

"I hate this feeling Y/n, stop!" he shouted louder, potentially disturbing those we tried sleeping in the dorms above. You looked up and saw a light on, a face smiling down at you. Rose.

"Please just tell me what I've done..i'll change for you i'll do anything. Y/n you're the only anchor in my life right now, i can't afford to loose you" 

It was getting more difficult to lie and you wanted so bad to just end the suffering and pain. You looked up at the window and saw her signalling to your phone. You opened it whilst he rambled on and read:

-Mum. Mention his mum now-

You blinked hard, not believing it. How could she be so evil?

-Hurry up and say it, say he's worthless and she doesn't love him. Do it or i'll go to the principal right now-

It's hard to believe this kind of manipulation is real and actually happens. You'd think it only occurred it movies but you were clearly wrong. Over and over he yelled, now crying and voice cracking whilst more and more texts filled your phone. 

Text tones and cries

they invaded your head and drowned you out. You felt sharp panic symptoms strangling your throat as it became hard to swallow . Crippling anxiety and a morbid mentality pushed you over the edge. You couldn't help but scream.

"LEAVE ME ALONE. I HAVE NEVER LOVED YOU AND I NEVER WILL. THIS BET WAS A JOKE, CAN'T YOU SEE THAT? YOU MEAN NOTHING TO ME"

the words literally fell out of your mouth. Even Rose couldn't process a reaction as she immediately turned off her light and everything went silent. You looked down at your stiff body in disbelief. Did i really just say that..?

You turned around with huge eyes and bright hot, tear stained cheeks, he who hung his head low dropped a single tear onto iced paths and just nodded. You couldn't even justify yourself, red handed you were guilty and too stunned to even try and convince him you were lying. He couldn't bare to look at you, you disgusted him that much. You searched his face for an answer but nothing. 

"Im glad to of seen you for who you are. Bet's over" 

he managed in the coldest tone. He proceeded to turn around, take one last breath and just like that, slipped right out of your life.

— — — 

~November 27th~

A few weeks has passed and you felt lifeless.

You felt like a monster.

Everyday was the same. Avoid friends, go to class, act like everything was ok then go back to bed and lay there, empty. You went through the typical cycle. Sadness, anger, regret, torture. But now lay in the worst stage; nothingness.

No emotions, just pure emptiness. It meant you couldn't move forward and do anything, instead lay there and wonder when this nightmare would end. Everyday posed the same question,

Am i walking out of a nightmare or into one?

But school ended soon and prom was among us. The winter prom helped raise money and was basically a competition for who was best dressed and had a date. As pathetic as proms were, you did like them. Dancing stupidly and singing far too loud with your best friends was once one of the best things you could do, but now the task seemed so difficult, foggy and disconnected from your past self - who you had let down so much..

"Y/n are you listening?" 

Your professor called and you sat up, still in terrible posture. You were in history and despised it. No one knew about what had happened, only you, Seungchol and Rose. Who by the way, seemed very happy with each other. 

She didn't event try and hide how they were basically together. Not officially, but she loved to self-proclaim it. Most people still viewed you with the same respect, blissfully unaware of how cruel you had been. Coups is a whole other story..

he tried to avoid you as much as he could, and when he did see you he looked at you stone cold as though you were nothing but a stranger. And why wouldn't he? He was able to live life and move on because he was broken up with, he believed he was the victim and could expect it.

But he did notice you once. It was yesterday, you dropped something and Rose failed to help, instead kicked it further. He walked up to you in the empty corridor. For a split second he looked as though he would help. You looked up with constantly blood-shot eyes but his were dark, a thick wall guarded by thorns and wire. But just for a mili-second, the defence came down. 

A caring, sympathetic look ventured in his eyes and knocked at the wall of his pupil, begging to be freed. But as soon as you opened your mouth the prisoner inside was strangled back down and his emotions suppressed as he walked past. 

Thus, you still held it close to your heart that they may be a possibility he may still like you.

In this unfair, unjust, harsh world

you still had an ounce of hope and you knew where to test it..


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