Chapter 27🥀

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I sit on the couch while Shawn is still getting dressed in the room. There is nothing interesting to watch on TV and I'm starting to get hungry. "I should continue making breakfast..." Shawn says walking out of his room towards the kitchen dressed in white Calvin Klein boxers and a gray long-sleeved T-shirt. "Hey um.," I call him, turning my head from the boring shows his TV has to offer. "What?" He looks at me, still on his way to the stove. "Are we-" words fail me... "I mean.." how will I say this? "Are we dating?" I ask finally. I feel stupid even asking after everything last night but I just want to make sure I hadn't dreamt it.

"What?" He chuckles. "It's just- I was thinking about telling my friends I have a boyfriend, but when I wanted to tell them, I thought about it and I wasn't sure if we were... you know" I smile nervously. "What do you think?" he asks. I can't tell if he is laughing at me or not."Do you want me to be?" He asks.

I stare at him. He caught me off guard and I don't know what to answer. Of course, I want him to be.

"Yes?" I whisper. "Are you asking for permission?" he chuckles again. "I don't know" I shake my head feeling stupid for bringing this up again.

"I just- I feel stupid even talking about this again. But what am I supposed to say when my friends ask me where I am? Can I tell them about you?" I can't quite catch his reaction because he immediately turns away giving his attention to the pancakes.

"I- I won't-" words fail me again.

"Look, I'm sorry I know how you feel about your life being public and all that, but I can't lie to my friends anymore. I won't tell them about us now, but eventually, if we are going to keep seeing each other I would want to tell them."

"I know. And you will. Just let's keep this between us for now. I want to be able to be with you without speculations about what people have to say." he looks at me now.

"I'm sorry if that sounds selfish but I just want to keep you all to myself. At least for now." He tells me honestly.

"Ok," I nod.

The day passes by faster then I thought possible. We ate some pancakes and he watched a movie, He told me stories about his family and about his life, and I share with him as well. It was one of the best days I've had in years and before I know it it's 6 p.m.

I ordered myself an Uber to come and pick me since Alex's car is with her. I should really buy a car. I dismiss that thought before I actually dwell on it.

When I walk in the dorm, The first thing I see is Alex and Rachel watching TV and eating ice cream.

"How was last night?" I asked as I took my shoes off.

"Are you talking to me?" Alex snapped. What is her deal?

"I asked you both," I say slowly not understanding why she's mad at me. I catch the Ice cream flavor with the side of my eye, cookie dough. Oh, my favorite. Before I change my mind I walk to the kitchen grabbing a spoon.

"What are we watching?" I ask, sitting next to them, with a full mouth of ice cream. "SpongeBob the movie" Rachel says coolly. Why are they so cold? Did something happen?

Wait, did she say SpongeBob the movie? What are we 12? I laugh.

"Where were you!?" Alex asks surprising me with the after taste of concern I hear on her voice.

"Oh ok," I swallow the lump forming in my throat. I shift a bit before I start talking. "I need to tell you guys something..." I take a deep breath "I have a boyfriend." I say. I exhale. Why was I so nervous about this?

"What happened to the last one? Maya said his name is Sean or something?"  Rachel says making me blush. Why am I blushing?

"The last one?" I ask confused for a second.

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