"You were a jerk, Jack, a total jerk. I hate you so much... but on the other hand, I also love you," Macey said as she sat down in front of the gravestone. She hesitated for a second, she thought it would be weird if she'd just sit down on the grass, but her legs hurt from running.
"I remember what you said..." she mumbled and looked up to the stars, they were shining bright, it was beautiful, "about me and Michael. I know what you wrote in that letter... But I just can't believe that's really what you would have wanted, you know?"
The girl sighed and laid her head in her hands. "You promised me you would take me ice skating one day, when we started dating, but you never did, and I completely forgot about it until today... or more like yesterday."
She needed a few seconds of silence until she started talking again, "I don't even want to be in a relationship again... But I can't help it but like Michael, I like him so much, and I feel so guilty because of it. I like him in a different way than I like you... but that doesn't mean I like him more or something. It's just different. Even though we are best friends and we have known each other for years, everything still feels so new with him."
Macey didn't notice the footsteps that were coming her way.
"I don't want to forget you, to forget the you I fell in love with. I don't want to forget all our wonderful memories and I don't want to forget why I loved you. I'm scared that Michael will make me forget. I'm scared that he would want me to forget."
She didn't hear the stones that someone kicked with their feet.
"I'm scared that I will love him less than you because that would make him a second choice, and he is so much better than that." The girl pulled her knees to her body as she felt a few tears silently running down her cheeks. "But I'm also scared I will love him more than you because you didn't deserve all the bad things that happened to you... you were way too nice and kind for that."
The girl didn't want to scare Macey, she hoped her friend would notice when she walked to the grave, but Macey didn't. She also didn't want to eavesdrop, but that was exactly what she did.
"I just don't know what I'm supposed to do, because I don't want to do everything wrong again, Jack. I did so much wrong in our relationship, I messed everything up and I know that now."
A few sobs escaped her lips, but she tried hard to hold them back. "You are not even here and you are still controlling my life... that's exactly what you wanted. You'd be happy now, wouldn't you?"
"Mace?" the girl whispered.
Macey tensed for a second, but she immediately recognised the voice and didn't even need to turn around to know who was standing behind her.
"How long have you been here?"
"I just came."
"Why?"
"You didn't answer any of my texts or calls, I wanted to make sure you were okay."
"How did you know I would be here?"
"Where else should you have been?"
Nathalie sat down next to her friend who was staring at the gravestone.
Macey was glad it wasn't one of the boys. For example Ashton, no matter how much she loved Ashton, if she would have heard just one of his wise responses she would have freaked out. Or Luke who thought Macey wasn't ready to move on anyway, his words wouldn't have made her feel better at all. Or Calum who would have had no idea what to do or say.
But Nathalie, Nathalie just always knew what to do.
Somehow Nathalie was always there when Macey needed her.
"You heard what I said, didn't you?"
She didn't even try to lie. "Yes."
"That sucks."
Macey leaned her head against the girl's shoulder and took a few deep breaths.
"I don't want to go home."
"We can stay here."
"I also don't want to stay. Graveyards at night are even more depressing than during the day."
"Alright." Nathalie stood up again and helped her friend up as well. "I'm here with my car, you can spend the night at our place."
"Wouldn't Calum mind?"
"Why should he? You can sleep on the couch, it's surprisingly comfy. It's not a big deal, Mace."
Macey hesitated for a second, but then she nodded. When she didn't start to move Nathalie took her hand in hers and walked to the car with her.
Nathalie didn't push her into telling her anything, but as soon as the car doors were closed Macey blurted out everything.
She told Nathalie about her date with Michael, every little detail. She told her about Jack, and about the letter he wanted to address to her, but died before he could. She told her about her struggles and insecurities. She told her what she wanted and didn't want. She told her about the reasons why she thought she couldn't ever be with Michael.
Everything that came into her mind.
It was a total mix up of emotions and thoughts, nothing seemed connected, yet everything was.
Nathalie didn't say anything, she just listened to her talking.
And after Macey finished and Nathalie parked the car she let her cry into her shoulder.
In that very moment Macey realised that, no matter how much she loved the four dorky boys, she would always need Nathalie in her life, for there are things no other could ever truly understand.
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This chapter is kinda bad, but whatever.
Also, I need to update less right now because my life is getting so out of control at the moment, sorry.
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The Only Reason || mgc
Fanfiction[Sequel to Safe Haven] "I can't do this, I'm freaking out, Nathalie, I am freaking out." Macey was lying on her bed in her room, phone pressed against her ear. She didn't know what to do, whatever she did seemed to be wrong. She wanted to tell Mich...
